Thanksgiving 2012

This may go down in history as the very worst post I’ve ever written.

Which actually  makes it kind of exciting. Historic in a way really.

But nonetheless … a terrible post in terms of writing.  Mainly because there isn’t going to be any.  This is going to be a pretty picture post.  You see, it’s Sunday night and I’ve just spent the past 3 days cooking, preparing, serving and cleaning. I said my last entertaining word around 1 hour ago when our last guests left.

Then I fell into a heap on the floor.

Oh … you know what … I think I actually got the timeline wrong.  The heaping happened around 3 hours before the guests left.  It was an unfortunate incident which you will see more of in a moment.

O.K.  Onto the Thanksgiving dinner inspiration photos ’cause I know you like those.

No more writing.

At all.

None.

Start looking at the pictures now.

 

The meal began early in the day gathering tomatoes from the garden for the Caprese salad.

It already sounds idyllic doesn’t it?  I mean come on.  Gathering tomatoes from the garden for God’s sake?

I   D   Y   L   L   I   C

Heirloom Tomato Platter

 

The front porch was swept …

Front Porch Broom

 

 

 

… and the planters planted.

Porch Fall Planters

 

 

 
I know!  Totally pretty.  Idyllic if you will.
 
20 people came for Thanksgiving dinner tonight.
 
Not a single one of them came in the front door.
 
Every SINGLE one of them came in the back door.
 

Fall Planters

 

 
Once in the house everyone was greeted by the menu in the kitchen.
 
For the first time in 15 years I changed our Thanksgiving menu.
 
In anticipation of this I stocked up on lots of booze to send my guests into an alcohol induced haze.
 
That plan worked on everyone who was drinking.
Everyone else wanted to know where the hell the White Trash Salad was.

Menu

 

The table.

This is what last years table and outdoor festivities looked like, with mismatched antique plates.

This year I went all white rectangular.  Snazzy.

Table 3

 

 

Table 1
Table 2
Table 4

 

I gathered all of the moss around the table at the cottage last year and this year.

Again with the idyllic.

You know this whole idyllic thing is going to end soon, right?

Because nobody lives their lives this way.

My Thanksgiving is no different than yours.

It’s a shit show.

Table 6
Table 7

The kids table.

Kids Table

 

Maple Sugar suckers to make ’em happy,

and personalized chalkboards to keep ’em busy.

Shockingly … this little plan actually worked.

The kids stayed and ate at their own table without wandering into the grown up room where the stripper was performing.

Kids Table 2

 

The meal ended with SEVERAL pies including apple, cherry cheese pie and the star of the show,

Pumpkin Pie made with real pumpkin

 

Then it was just a matter of the Great Gobble Off and shoving everyone out the door.

(video to follow in the next week or so)  (of the gobble off, not shoving everyone out the door)

Table 8

 

Everyone left out the back door as well.

Luckily I anticipated this and did planters by the back door as well.

Fall Cabbages In Planters

 

Seems nice doesn’t it?

A lovely Thanksgiving.

Fall Planter

 

And it was.

For everyone who managed to squeeze into the dining room.

Seems I underestimated how big 15 people are.

Me, one of my sisters and my niece quietly ate in the kitchen.

We had no cutlery.

Or chairs.

The cutlery was on the dining room table at our place settings which were taken over by my apparently enormous family and we felt stupid going to get it.

I found 3 teaspoons which we all ate our Thanksgiving dinner with.

Floor

 

See?  Even if someone’s life looks idyllic, it probably isn’t.  Which is not to say it isn’t fun.  Or enjoyable.  Or hilarious.  My non idyllic evening was all of those things.

Or so I thought as I sat, in a heap on the floor.

 

 

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100 Comments

  1. Sheila says:

    I know this is an old post but I enjoy reading the old ones as much as the new. Love the kids’ table and now that we have a grand baby I’m getting ready for it! Also, many years ago my brother-in-law sent me a pair of beautiful handmade beaded moccasins from a native friend in BC. They smelled of a wood fire. Apparently my dog loved them also…and chewed them up. I was really mad at the time but then realized what good “taste” she has…thanks for another story that’s fun and inspiring as well.

  2. Antonia says:

    Gorgeous! You do everything so beautifully! Loved your planters, your table, the kids’ chalkboards…EVERYTHING! Should be in a magazine!

  3. Emily says:

    I am absolutely rolling at this as I had my own go ’round with the universe’s alternative plan a few years back. I adore your site. Thanks for the humor mixed in with your fabulous things!

  4. Barbie says:

    My FAVORITE post thus far!

  5. Bonnie J. Poirier says:

    L♥VE this story! You are now dubbed my perfect little invisible friend. LOL

  6. Karen–It was BEAUTIFUL!

  7. Sarah {20 State} says:

    Love the term ‘shit show’, the Aussie version would be ‘rough as guts’…just in case you want to go intercontinental (pretty sure I mispelt this…)

  8. Jan says:

    I coud be wrong but are the plates Homer Laughlin Times Square? Modern and not vintage but they are incredibly durable. I have a bunch of them. Love em!

  9. Michelle Drummond says:

    Karen I only just found your blog recently but have enjoyed your posts, they are so refreshing. Loved this post too and you had me LOL at “shit show”. I thought maybe this was my thanksgiving dinner, except that your presentation is soo much nicer than mine.

    • Karen says:

      Thanks Michelle. I forgot to mention there were also balloon animals, several whipped cream explosions (long story) and an unfortunate incident with a very strong martini and a drunk mother. I made up *one* of those things. I’ll let you decide which one. ~ karen

  10. Nancy Blue Moon says:

    That was beautiful Karen..Please know that you are very lucky to have a “together” family like yours..Those of us who don’t are envious..especially at the holidays..Thank you for sharing them with us..I hope you and the Fella had a relaxing Thanksgiving today..Also the table is amazing..

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