As I write this post, I’m watching Toddlers and Tiaras. Competing tonight are Savanna, Savannah and Savana. The good news is, when they graduate from being future strippers of America to working strippers of America, they won’t have to pick out an alternative stage name.
Plus they know how to jiggle their asses while making a kissy face which will pretty much guarantee early admittance to medical school.
At the moment, a Chucky doll dressed as a saloon hooker is drinking a Red Bull. I think I’m most appalled by the Red Bull. Oop! One of them just screamed at her mother and then hit her in the head. Isn’t that just darling?
Speaking of mothers and Red Bulls, I haven’t seen my mother Betty with one lately. You might remember, a while ago my mother was hooked on Red Bull and was taking it as “medication”. As in, I overheard her mutter, “Oh shoot, I forgot to take my Red Bull today“. Betty’s a bit frugal, like I am, so at one point she bought some no-name Red Bull, copy cat drink. It gave her the squiggles. It could be she’s been off it since then.
Somebody needs to give Savanna/Savannah/Savana a can of copy cat Red Bull.
Since it’s the weekend and closing in on the end of the month even, I wanted to give a hip hop, rock and roll, old fashioned shout out to my sponsors.
These are the people that help pay for the trips to Dollarama and the migraine medication.
First up … !
These are the fine folks who came to the rescue when I tried to change my website’s server myself. They’re website designers. And geniuses. I can install central vac, build a chicken coop, fix a dryer, touch my tongue to the end of my nose, but I couldn’t move my website. When a year’s worth of work is stuck in cyberspace the world is a scary place. WayLay literally swooped in and saved the day. I’ve never seen the folks from WayLay but I’m pretty sure they wear capes and masks.
Funny story. On the last show I did, W Expert Challenge for W Network there was a P.A. (production assistant) named Elizabeth. Fast forward several months later and Elizabeth is contacting me to advertise on my site! She not only knows how to run around on set like a crazy person, she also knows how to design jewellery. Or, as it’s sometimes known, jewelry. O.K. The story wasn’t funny so much as interesting. To me.
Longtime readers of The Art of Doing Stuff might recognize Adrienne Audrey’s button because it’s so beautiful. Oddly, it happens to be beautiful without the addition of a spray tan, false eyelashes, or a hair piece the size of a mountain goat. She’s a return advertiser from a few months ago. It might be the most beautiful ad I’ve ever seen. I’m completely mesmerized by it. So, it would make sense that she also has beautiful jewellery/jewelry. And she does. And here are my favourites! The first one incorporates a silver butterfly wing. I loveeeeeeee it. You can see my favourites by clicking here, here and here.
I will highlight the best of my remaining sponsors next Friday! Hopefully I won’t be as worked up by Toddlers and Tiaras. I’ll try and watch something a little more calming.
Like The Exorcist. Whose featured child was infinitely more charming than most of those tiara wearing Toddlers.