Easiest way to fix a clogged toilet.

There is nothing that strikes fear in a lady’s heart like living alone.

Because there’s no man to blame a clogged toilet on.

Last week I mentioned I had a slight problem with my toilet. I mentioned it all casual like, as if it wasn’t a big deal.

And it wasn’t. Until it was. Which is often the case with toilets. They seem a little iffy. Kind of temperamental. And then one day, your toilet lets you know EXACTLY how angry it is at you. It burps feces at you. And before you know it you’re running, RUNNING from feces chasing you across the bathroom floor.

Screaming at the horror of it all is clearly pointless, but scream you do. In slow motion, while diving for anything that will stop the horror. Rolls of toilet paper, shower curtains, a cat. You scream and slip and bark and for some reason start maniacally spraying Poo-Pourri on everything.

They say before you die your life flashes before your eyes. I can tell you that doesn’t happen when your toilet overflows. Insead, what flashes before your eyes is every possible person that could conceivably appear at your door at the very moment you’re trying to corral poop with a makeup bag. Your neighbour, your mother, a friend, the grocery store clerk who once mentioned 3 years ago she’d like to see your house, Steve Buscemi, the Pope, Robin Leach. ANYONE COULD WALK THROUGH THAT DOOR.

Why didn’t you have rubber gloves in the bathroom? Or boots??? Or holy water?? This never would have happened if you didn’t have an irrational fear of using public restrooms. You make a promise to go into therapy and conquer that fear at which point you will ONLY use public restrooms leaving your own bathroom as a sanctuary for wayward and constipated youth.

Don’t think it could get any more fun than that? Watch this.

Plumbing problems

 

Join me as I explore the laugh-riot world of plumbing problems.

And that my friends is what’s known as a shit show.

76 Comments

  1. Joy says:

    Hi Karen. Fun video. Glad you got your toilet fixed in the end, even though it was costly. I guess there’s a give and take when you live in an older home like that. In your case, you may want to be cautions when it comes to flushing anything down your toilet. To play it safe, only flush toilet paper and everything else like q tips, cotton, balls, and floss should go in a waste basket.

  2. Yabut says:

    I have a young grandson that frequently plugs toilets, including mine. We are teaching him better ways to deal with the toilet paper in hope that helps. I have discovered that when I do the plugging, waiting a while and flushing again works fine, so I guess I’m using appropriately dissolving tissue, thank god. He’s not so patient though, and has caused the whole thing to overflow, which is not fun! Loved your video, and got a good giggle at least. Misery loves company, as they say. 🙂

  3. R A Voll says:

    Keep having to discard perfectly good phone chargers because the new one shaped the plug differently. Can’t we just clip off the old plug and replace it with a plug of the new shape. But how?

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  6. Louise says:

    It’s 3:30AM in California and I’ve just had one of those days – the kind where all the hard work you put in was for nothing! (And this was for several projects, so I’m REALLY frustrated!) I’m glad I found this post, as it made me feel better. Even the great Karen has days like that!

    Also, I must compliment you on the beauty of the sequence where the plumber drives up. Yes, it showed him coming to your rescue, but it was so much more. The snowy, peaceful scene with just the touch of red from your wreath, all beautifully framed by your fence, is then artistically punctuated by his red truck pulling up to the curb. Really, I played it over and over. Now THIS would be a meaningful Christmas card to so many of us single women!

  7. Andrew Lisenby says:

    Karen,
    You are a smart and resourceful person. I have gone through many, many years of plumbing problems with always old, crumbling, half-assed plumbing. We currently have one of the Gerber Dual Flush toilets in each of our 2 bathrooms. This was supposed to be the answer- a toilet than can flush crap 50-75 ft. through a sewer line. It has not turned out to be the fix to our problems. Still, the toilets get clogged because you know why? To save water, the toilet makers reduced the size of the outlet going into the sewer line (under the commode). It doesn’t take a lot of paper and fecal matter to clog that up. What I have found is to keep a gallon jug of liquid laundry detergent in the bathroom, and if it has one of those pump dispensers then more the better. Every few days, and before you flush the toilet, pump about 2 or three pumpfuls of detergent on top of the stuff in the toilet and give it some time to do its’ work. This has saved my bacon many times. I am disabled and cannot crawl under the house or climb on top to use a “50 ft. snake” like I used to.
    Once you know that your plumbing vent stacks are clear, get some heavy gauge “hardware cloth” or screen wire from your favorite hardware or home store, cut a piece large enough to fit over the stacks with a few inches around the side. Buy some stainless steel hose clamps, about a 4 inch one should work. Fit this hose clamp over the vent stack and tighten the clamp down to hold the screen wire in place. This will keep out rodents, leaves, twigs, etc. I hope this helps you Karen. You ROCK!

    Andrew

  8. Tyree Back says:

    Great video, most people would ignore the bubbling water issue and let things get worse so this hopefully raise a bit of awareness. Better to fix a small problem before it’s a big one.

  9. Ohhmergerd !! Laugh out loud !!

    Love the sound effects … but dang… flushing money down the toilet. Grrrrrh.

    I think you should have kicked it.

    🙂

  10. Mary Werner says:

    My first laugh burst out at the HOUR 1 text. That was great! Then came the bright red truck under the green garland LOL. I would have called the first time I looked out your bathroom window so high up Mary Poppins couldn’t have reached it. Love your posts, Mary

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