My top 5 Easter posts. Even though I don’t much care for Easter.

First off, thanks to all the men who came out of hiding and commenting on Friday’s post.  It resulted in truly one of the most entertaining comment sections this blog has ever seen.

Now … back to the way we were, when men just lurked.  Onto today’s post!

Easter is a religious holiday.  I understand that as much as any other non-baptized, unchristened, (even though my mother was going to be a nun,)  heathen can.  And I applaud all the people who celebrate it with religion in mind.

Everyone else who celebrates it as a reason to eat ham can suck it.  Ham is gross.  Reason number 1 I don’t like Easter.

The weather cannot be counted on in these parts.  Easter day might be warm and dry, or wet and cool or sleety and miserable or all of the aforementioned.  It’s impossible to pick out a correct outfit for Easter dinner more than 43 seconds in advance.  Reason number 2 I don’t like Easter.

The great ham fart of 2001.  I’d rather not go into further detail about this one, but suffice it to say it’s my reason number 3 for not liking Easter.

I do however, like dragging out the growing collection of nature inspired Easter decorations I’m building up.  All things that evoke a sense of “spring is in the air”, new life is coming forth.  An appreciation of nature at its finest.  As a (reputed) carpenter/builder I rather think Jesus would appreciate the design aesthetic of it all.  Bird’s nests and burlap are way more Jesus than pink cellophane straw and pastel bunnies in hats.   And I do not think he would like ham.  I’m fairly certain on that as a matter of fact.  Smart guy.

Nature just brings spring and happiness and new beginnings to mind.  My sister (pink tool belt) and I had a conversation the other day actually. I was telling her how at least once a day I smash my face into the pot of hyacinths I have on my kitchen counter and breath in as deeply as I can. I love the smell of hyacinths.  She on the other hand said she likes the smell of them but not because she enjoys the actual scent of the hyacinth but because the smell makes her feel like spring is coming.  The same could be said of worms and wet dog poop but those aren’t things I  have on my counter. On a regular basis.

I’ve rounded up my favourite Easter DIYS for you.  These are them.  (I can be quite eloquent when I want to can’t I?)

 

Ester-stocking-7

Easter Stocking

peep-placecard

Yeah, technically they  fall into that tacky Easter category but Peeps always get a pass.

peep-placecard-boy

Peeps Placecards

 easter-wreath

 Moss Easter Wreath

easter-cloche-1

Spring under glass Nothing says spring quite like a bird’s nest.

window-box

Vintage look planter box with Print on Wood technique

Don’t feel like making anything?  Don’t worry about it.   Just go and buy some potted bulbs.  Smash your face right in them, inhale deeply and say hello to spring.

Just to reiterate … there are a few things that smell like spring.  Choose carefully when deciding which spring scent to feature on your kitchen counter.

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61 Comments

  1. Cynthia Jones says:

    Warning! Paranoid rant ahead.

    If that nest is a real one, pull on a pair of rubber gloves and stick it in the oven as hot as it can stand without burning it, for half an hour, then get some spider spray and spray the crap out of the whole area it was anywhere near. Must be spider spray not bug spray.

    Trust me on this one, birds nests carry bird mites and they come in thousands, are too small to see and they will infest humans despite what doctors and scientists say.

    Never, never , never bring a bird nest inside your house or let a bird make one on the outside of your house.

    I’ve had four years of a nightmare caused by bird mites.

    PHEW!

    That’s it. Nice eggs, nice dome, nice wreath. I had never heard of Peeps until two days ago. Not available in Australia. Meringue with candy (lolly) on the outside or icing?

    Who’s Norm? Robert’s brother? bwaaahah!

    • IRS says:

      OK, while I can certainly relate to paranoia, I’m a little confused here. You mention spider spray, but then don’t say anything about spiders. Just bird mites. What’s the connection? Also, while I don’t ever intend to have a wild aviary inside my home, am I supposed to climb my trees like a demented landlord, evicting birds as I go?

      • Cynthia Jones says:

        Mites are not insects, they are arachnids = in the spider family. Bug spray does not kill mites.

        “Are you supposed to climb your trees flinging nests and birds left right and centre” ?”

        Well, you can if you want to, just don’t bring a birds nest inside your house or let them make a nest in your eaves or you will spend years regretting it. No joke! True.

        • Jessica says:

          Take the mite warning seriously. I went to clean up a nest and didn’t know better. The mite infestation took over my life for almost 2 months and all I did was touch it. As I touched it I noticed all of these teeny little bugs on me and went running into my house to shower. Bad idea. Awful. They infested my skin and my house. The bites are horrible and I was red and itchy everywhere.

    • Debison says:

      Peeps are marshmallow covered with sugar. And delicious.

  2. peg says:

    thank you so much for the peeps on a stick . 😀

  3. Grammy says:

    That wreath makes my heart sing.

  4. Kate says:

    I agree-ham is gross!

  5. I did not get christened or baptized or whatever either. My mom just couldn’t be bothered by the time I was born. There are a lot of things she couldn’t be bothered to do or teach me by the time I came along. She didn’t even have a name because she was expecting a boy and got a girl. I was a “big” baby and that was how they deciphered the sex back then. She was a good woman, my mom, but sometimes I feel a little cheated in certain departments that my sisters were not.
    I hate those giant Easter Rabbits (people in a rabbit costume) they have at the shops to charm (or scare) little children. They are as creepy as clowns.
    I do like heralding the coming of Spring though, the “Season of Unlocking” as novelist Kurt Vonnegut describes this sometimes nice, sometimes icy season. Have you ever read his works?

  6. Zoe says:

    Where I’m from (Dublin,Ireland ) we have lamb on Easter sunday ! Much better than ham. I also don’t like the way ham is cooked in America but that’s another rant altogether. Just in case you were looking for some menu alternatives !

  7. Tigersmom says:

    I’m not big on ham either. Or cutesy spring décor.

    I am a big nature lover and at times I like to combine it with another of my loves, bling, and bling out nature. Not too much, just a gentle pairing of the two. For example one of the eggs, (maybe two but they would be of different sizes) in my birds nest would be gold leafed.

  8. Heather says:

    Peeps are gross…but I may just have to do the peeps on a stick for my Easter table. Roast beef. No ham. The only reason we have Easter dinner is because all the family goes to the cottage so it’s an excuse for a sit down family dinner…and it gives me an excuse to dress up the table.

    I was at the mall on the weekend and walked by a store & all I could smell were fresh flowers. I stopped, turned around & looked for the flower shop. None. There was a Bowrings shop & I guess it was their pot pourri. When I walked into the store I couldn’t smell the same smell & didn’t bother to ask. I would’ve sworn I was by a flower shop. Methinks I need to go and get some hyacinths.

  9. Jody says:

    As a fellow heathen I plan someday to have Easter dinner that accurately depicts the menu of The Last Supper. I don’t think it included ham or turkey. I’m thinking more olives, pita and hummus.

    • Pati Gulat says:

      Olives, pita and hummus sounds divine ! I used to live in Izmir, Turkey and miss all of the aforementioned terribly ! Can’t get the quality here like you can there…

  10. Maria says:

    Christmas and Easter are two of my religions that have been secularized so that all the non-baptized non-christened people can join in in ways that are meaningful to them. Not that they are participating in a way that is meaningful to the actual religious holiday.

    As a Christian, I wouldnt begin to guess if Jesus would like your decorations. I suspect He is working on larger matters. Please don’t be flippant about Jesus. He’s a very serious subject for the believers who like your blog.

    I like your decorations. I think they celebrate the return of spring very nicely. They promise flowers and cookouts and grass mowing and gardening. Perhaps you are celebrating spring and should just leave Easter and Jesus out of it.

    • Sandi says:

      Maria, I’m a Christian as well and I want Karen to know that I don’t have any issue at all with her post or with non Christians celebrating Easter. To each his or her own as long as you aren’t harming anyone and Karen isn’t harming anyone, she’s making them laugh which is an incredible gift to give people. Have a blessed day.

    • Karen says:

      Sorry Maria. Obviously my intention isn’t to offend people, but to be honest I didn’t believe there was anything offensive in the post. I realize that in the eyes of Christians Jesus has bigger matters than my decorations, which is why I roll my eyes whenever anyone on a reality show prays to Jesus that they win. ~ karen!

      • Maria says:

        I roll my eyes too.

        Thank you for your kind response. You are one classy lady.

        PS–I love ham.

      • Pati Gulat says:

        I’m a Christian, Karen and I wasn’t offended. 🙂 I think you’re amazing and love your decor….. Make sure you spray that birds nest tho before you bring it in the house ! Lol !

        • Karen says:

          Thanks Pati! (I would guess about half of my readers are Christian and would estimate of those 99% of them have a great sense of humour so I really didn’t think my post would offend anyone) Oh! And the birds nest is old. I’ve had it for years. I stuck it in the freezer for a few days in a plastic bag. ~ karen!

  11. Vicky says:

    We bar b que steak

  12. Valerie says:

    Interesting DIYs although I cannot get too excited about birdies. I love birds however for the past three years at around Easter time there has been a robin who arrives here that goes around to each and every window in the house pecking at the glass. It is quite unnerving and the mess this flying critter leaves behind is unspeakable. There doesn’t appear to be a nest near by, as according to the internet this may be the reason for the behaviour. If there are any others that have this situation the one thing that reduces this is to hang bits of tin foil suspended by masking tape on the glass. Thought I would pass my unusual tin foil Easter decorating idea along as I feel certain we can’t be the only ones having this curiosity occurring.

  13. marilyn says:

    i love ham, and Easter.it always signals the time that the earth starts to wake up, you can smell the dirt and gardening season is tantalisingly close! my daughter gave me a pink hyacinth that i have been sniffing several times a day…it is breathtaking! i truly feel that spring flowers are the best smelling ones..and the prettiest..who can resist peonies, lilacs,lily of the valley and mock orange? pure bliss!

  14. Mermaid Scribbler says:

    Aw, Karen. Jesus would probably love your decorations. He’d probably even eat dinner with you because, after all, sometimes he did eat with people who weren’t religious (See: Zaccheus – a non-religious guy who was…pretty much a criminal). I don’t, however, think that would eat the ham…because while he could eat it, pigs are gross and ham is really unhealthy. I, on the other hand, love ham. I LOVE it! I really love it baked with brown sugar and mustard which is why – if you’ve read the earlier posts – I must now go and find a cave in which to stay for three whole days. *sigh*

  15. What did the egg say to the joking chicken? “Oh you crack me up!” 🙂

    PS: For sure Jesus wouldn’t not have eaten ham. It would have been a religious “No-No” for Him.

  16. Melissa in North Carolina says:

    I am a Christian, I eat ham but not Peeps and I love Spring and dislike the cutsie Easter decor. Love your Easter socks Karen. I would love one to hang on a door filled with fresh Spring blooms, twigs and greens.

    • Karen says:

      Easter socks, lol. That’s actually a brilliant idea to hang them on the door with flowers in them!!! I didn’t even think of that! What’s happening to me, lol? ~ karen!

    • Karen says:

      p.s. I don’t like to eat Peeps either. I just like to look at the weird little things. ~ karen!

      • Larraine says:

        I may be a little late to this discussion but I must jump in with a word for Peeps to all of you who have a problem with them. Don’t focus on eating them — relate to them! The Washington Post has a Peeps contest each year with a theme and the entries are wonderful and clever. You’ll never look at Peeps the same way again. Check washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/magazine/peeps. And a happy day of revival and rebirth to each of you….

  17. Ev Wilcox says:

    I really really like ham. Why is it gross? Peeps are cute, but gross to eat. Liked the burlap stockings. Happy Spring, Karen!

  18. Susan De Masi says:

    I grew up in an Italian household, so Easter dinner was lasagne. I don’t care for Peeps, too much like biting into sandpaper, but I saw Chocolate-covered Peeps the other day-might have to try that! Karen, you can’t refer to something like the Great Ham Fart of 2001 and then leave us hanging-tell!

  19. Wendy says:

    I love, love, love Peeps. And Cadbury’s easter creme eggs.
    That’s about it.

    Ham–Ghak.
    Chocolate Bunnies–stale candy.
    Egg baskets made by my kids–a school make-work project.

    But throw some matzoh bri with lots of salt and pepper my way . . . now you’re talking!

  20. Rhonda Notschaele says:

    I agree with Susan, please tell the Great Ham Fart story.

  21. Cussot says:

    My favourite Easter decorations have disappeared from Dollar Store shelves in recent years – the chenille pipe-cleaner chicks of yore. I miss their fuzzy little cuteness.

  22. maggie van sickle says:

    Not a ham fan either Karen. I have Grandchildren so fluffy Easter stuff is in as are my Grand Daughters favourite thing “Peeps”. For someone who is not crazy about Easter you did a marvelous job pulling together Easter decorations . I love them. Happy Peeps day Karen enjoy your Family and the festivities.

  23. Jennifer says:

    Every year we make a bunny theme cake for Easter dinner. The themes have ranged from earthquake victims (the year the cake split) to movies (Kill Bill, with lots of red gel icing) to books. The challenge is that we always use peeps and/or chocolate bunnies for the main characters. The year we did The Great Gatsby – hundreds of tiny pearl candies glued with chocolate frosting to a white chocolate bunny for Daisy’s dress. I know this has nothing to do with the true meaning of Easter, but now it’s a tradition that has a life of its own!

  24. Sera says:

    I love ham. Ham and bacon and sushi are why I can’t be a vegetarian. But I’m pretty sure Jesus wouldn’t eat ham because he was a Jew. Funny thing that.
    And peeps are disgusting, but I agree, hilarious as a decoration. I’m starting to wonder how long I can use my newborn baby as an excuse to never decorate for the season again. But that’s my excuse. happy spring!!!

  25. Ben says:

    does that last picture have three stacked ham?

  26. Lauren from Winnioeg says:

    Okay. I have to give my vote for ham for Easter, even though it’s the only time I make it. I wonder if the people who don’t like it have only had the horrible “nuggets” or a true ham that was just thrown into the oven with a glaze. My mother-in-law taught me how to make ham. Always buy the butt end because it has the most meat. Boil it for an hour and a half. Then spread on the glaze and bake until glaze is bubbly, basting now and then. You will have a flavourful, tender ham with most of the sodium and other crap they add boiled out. I never cared for ham until I tried hers.

    For us atheists, Easter is just a traditional time for a family dinner. Although I was baptized it was only because it was the thing to do at the time. Easter was always the holiday with chocolate and the Easter Bunny. Although it was in regards to a different holiday, when my son was around 10 or so, we passed by a church advertising their Christmas services and my son asked in all seriousness “Why would anyone want to go to church on Christmas?” Ahhhh…the life of heathens.

    Cheers!

  27. Lauren from Winnipeg says:

    Can’t believe I made a typo on my city’s name. Oh the shame…..

  28. Heather says:

    After reading this I happened to be in WalMart and they had blue and purple PEEPS! I got purple ones for the girls and blue ones for the boys (it’s an excuse to buy 2 colours.) I am so making those placecard holders this year!

  29. patricia h says:

    Relax, Karen. Just saw this on CNN……BREAKING NEWS……EASTER CANCELLED…..BODY FOUND

  30. Christie says:

    Carrot cake… one of the good things about Easter – with tons and tons of cream cheese icing of course.

    • Karen says:

      Seriously?! Is that a thing???!!! How did I not know this? I LOVE C A R R O T C A K E! This really needs to be brought up at the next family meeting. ~ karen!

    • Grammy says:

      Oh, my, I LOVE carrot cake, so how did I not think of it for Easter? What a cool idea. And, yes, carrot cake isn’t real without the cream cheese frosting.

      And, unlike Karen, I have no intention of bringing it up at the next family meeting because I have a family of weirdos who would probably nix the idea. I figure if I make it they can eat it or not. If not, their loss.

  31. Christie says:

    If you want to tie in the spring theme, you can decorate the carrot cake with little candied flowers. Personally, I don’t see the need – the cake is gone waaay too fast for that!

  32. Cathy Reeves says:

    We were never big on Easter, either and we were Catholic-ish. Anyway, your decorations are fab, I envy your multi colored eggs. I’ll have chickens in my next life. And I don’t think you insulted Jesus at all; I think he loves a good joke, loves to laugh. Laughing is healthy, might even produce endorphin thingies. I think if you live by the Golden Rule, you’re good to go.

  33. barbee says:

    My favorite Easter memory from childhood:my mother had dressed my sisters & I in the matching dresses she had made (patent Maryjanes, white gloves, the whole shebang) & sent us outside till time to go to church. Against all odds, a rabbit ran across the yard & into the woods. I will never forget my mother’s face when we finally returned, muddy & bedraggled, claiming to have seen the actual Easter bunny!

  34. Renee says:

    Yeah, not a fan of Easter either. When our sons were young we started a tradition of going skiing at Lake Tahoe for the Easter weekend. We love that it is so quirky and just plain, fun! The Easter Bunny on skis passing out candy. Sometimes we’d attend Mass (in our ski clothes, hey saved on Easter outfits). The closest thing to the “Ham” was on the pizza with pineapple, ha! Little did I know back then that the “kids” ages 27 and 24 would continue to enjoy the tradition. This year however, California is in a severe drought…our snow pack is frightfully low and ski resorts have closed early. My husband and I will spend Easter in San Francisco attending a museum exhibit, again very non-traditional and that makes us happy!

  35. Suzanne says:

    If you put peeps in the microwave they expand like a Japanese monster in the movies come to destroy Tokyo! Then they pop and fizzle out like a balloon. Just saying…

    • Pati Gulat says:

      COOL !!! Suzanne, that will have to be done now for the grandkids…. There’s no getting around it..lolol…. Not to mention the fact that I would like to see it as well., 😉

  36. Shirley says:

    I can’t believe Easter is so close and we still have 4 feet of snow on the ground in Nova Scotia. I sure hope the bunny hides colored eggs and not white. I feel like nuking a few marshmallow peeps. Sounds like fun. They hurt my teeth but would be cute on a stick. Thanks for the advice on no bird nests in the house – hey but I bet if you put them in the microwave and nuked the mites, that might work instead of chemicals. Sounds gross. I just joined your blog because my friends all call me a crazy chicken lady and I need reassurance that I am not crazy – just chicken crazy and that is normal for MANY people. My farmer friends think I am quite nuts, presumably because they never hug their hens!!!?? Actually I just really like your ideas all of this above is giving me a good laugh. To each their own as long as everyone plays nice. P.S. I am on the fence about ham. My chickens would like it but too much salt is not good for them. Got to get out side for a bit for only the second day this spring it has been above freezing. Die, snow!!! The sound it makes melting gives me hope.

    • Karen says:

      Welcome Shirley! You probably are crazy, but that’s fine. Anything else is normal and normal is boring and normal has never once changed the world. ~ karen!

  37. Shirley says:

    Haha Karen! That put a smile on my face! Good answer. I think crazy should be the new normal. It sure must be easy to be “normal” without all the creativity busting out of the house into decorating a coop, fretting over if the swing is the right height, if the new girl will ever be accepted, if some bloody critter chewed their head, or toes off (this has not happened yet) etc…..I think my husband has decided to put up with the chicks pooping on the floor of the attached garage when they sneak in, as he just threw them some greens. Here’s to crazy!! Cheers!

  38. Shirley says:

    Oh back to Easter, my favourite memory was Dad bringing in rabbit turds and sprinkling them around on the floor to try to keep me believing. We didn’t have rabbits so he must have been hunting!! He was quite the guy.

  39. Wyn says:

    I confess I never liked Easter even before I became atheist. I found the death Jesus to be disturbing as well as the resurrection. It has just never been something I believed or enjoyed hearing about.

    Ham Is only okay. To me it is an ingredient (like in Pea Soup), but not a main course. However, my mother and sister like it a lot, so we make it. I do like deviled eggs and dessert though.

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