Last winter I was complaining to my sister Fish Pedicure about how I had too much to do and didn't have any idea how I was going get it all done.
My well thought out solution, was to sit in the corner and stare at a dead bug.
Vacuuming was one of the things on my to do list by the way.
She scoffed and said, all you need is for someone else to do your website photos for you. That would free up a lot of your time. As long as whoever's taking the pictures has chipped, black nail polish the readers will never know the difference.
Fish pedicure has a great sense of humour. She wasn't using it in this particular moment. She was quite serious. And quite right. Not about someone else taking my photos, that's just stupid, but about my chipped black nailpolish.
You know how taking pictures of her own ass is Kim Kardashian's trademark? Chipped, black nails are kind of mine. Her trademark gets her millions of Twitter followers, mine gets me offers of change and a warm place to sleep from random strangers. Suck on that Kim.
Now that I've addressed my problem, I can address the product.
Sally Hansen's Miracle Gel Nailpolish. A product that claims to last for 2 weeks, just like a manicurist applied gel would.
How could I say no?
So I shelled out $11.99 for a bottle of topcoat and $11.99 for a bottle of polish and started the experiment.
I painted different nails with different combinations of the Sally Hansen Miracle gel polish, regular polish and the Sally Hansen Miracle gel top coat.
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In case you can't be bothered to analyze the nail graph, the middle, index and thumb nail of my left hand were Miracle gel polish and Miracle gel topcoat. Those are the ones to watch.
The actual Miracle Gel Nail polish comes in all kinds of colours, but since Black is what I wear most in the winter black is what I got. Also the bottle of top coat is black, but the top coat itself is clear like regular top coat.
I decided I needed to divide my fingers up into sections. One section would have Miracle gel polish and Miracle gel topcoat. Another section would have regular nail polish with the gel topcoat. And the final sections would have regular nail polish and regular topcoat.
I would wear this nail polish through my regular daily activities (including but not limited to baking, fixing large appliances, digging up potatoes, cleaning up cat vomit, scratching mystery things off the floor and giving bad drivers the finger)
After a few days things were looking iffy. This is the hand with the Miracle gel polish and Miracle gel top coat on the thumb, index and middle finger. You can see here how dull the top coat is. It just isn't nice and shiny. And it wasn't even when it was first put on. Plus … after just 3 days slight chipping at the tips and base is starting.
The chances of this gel polish lasting for 2 weeks as advertised is looking slim. I'm already thinking the "miracle" portion of the label should probably be scratched out.
However. The Miracle gel polish and Miracle gel top coat was holding up much better than my other hand. The right hand has regular polish and Miracle gel top coat on the index, middle finger and thumb. They're already a mess.
I'm quite used to walking around with fingernails that look like a disaster. It's kind of my way and I'm O.K. with it. The reason is that my nails become a mess so quickly. Within days after doing them they look like I joined a chain gang immediately after digging myself out of a grave.
But this. THIS was bad. After leaving black nailpolish on for 2 weeks this is how they looked.
The top hand is the hand with the gel polish and gel topcoat on the index, middle finger and thumb. Clearly it doesn't look as good as new after 2 weeks. The ring finger and pinkie are regular nail polish with regular top coat.
The bottom hand is the hand with the regular polish and gel topcoat on the index, middle finger and thumb. It's even worse.
Want a closer look at the beauty of the Sally Hansen gel polish and top coat that's guaranteed to look good for 2 weeks?
Well here it is after 2 weeks.
And here is the hand with the regular polish and the Sally Hansen gel topcoat. It can only be described as a shitshow.
There are two things the Sally Hansen polish has going for it.
1) It does hold up better than regular polish.
2) For some reason while I was removing it, the nail polish remover didn't make it bleed and smear all over my fingers and nail beds. It removed fairly cleanly.
Other than that? It was horrible. It was a complete disappointment.
I know that I'm harder on my nails than your average cattle rancher but I was still hoping for some kind of good if not great result.
I didn't get it. I got nails that looked like they belonged on a common crack whore as opposed to a higher quality crack whore.
Sally Hansen Miracle Gel Polish rates:
1 cleaver out of 4.
The only miracle here was the fact that in the full 2 weeks nobody asked me if I needed any cardboard to help keep the rain out while I slept in my hovel under the bridge.
amanda g
You are too funny! Just really love reading your pieces, no matter what the subject. You have to write a book.... the world needs it.
Karen
Stay tuned Amanda … ~ karen
Connie S.
I often forget to put gloves on when gardening, painting , washing dishes etc so my hands take a beating most days. And i don't like /have time to fuss over my nails either, other than filing them smooth once in a while . But i did discover a GREAT brand of nail polish this summer at the Dollar store!!! yes! The Dollar Tree to be exact. "LAC" / L.A. COLOURS -color craze with hardeners. They come in clear , with a faint blue or pink tint or solid colours. I chose #659 a taupey/nude with a pearlized (?) shine. Lasts for a couple of weeks and instead of chipping it just sort of wears thin and i often just paint a fresh coat right over top. Don't put a base coat or top coat on either. Ocassionally will get out the acetone polish remover and start over fresh. Haven't tried the darker colours yet since i prefer lighter shades but even their clear coat lasts a long time.
Not bad for a buck and a quarter!
doris
I know you are a BUSY women running around to see if you can catch some extra minutes in a day.
I was reading you experiment on nail polish and thought why don't you just give up on nail polish
and go Naturel finger nails and just trim them. You would get, for sure, extra time for things you need to do in one day.
Karen
Well, mainly because I like nice stuff and like to look nice and not like a homeless person all the time, lol. Because I am constantly digging in the dirt and rummaging in garbage bins for great stuff that people have cast away, I want to look nice while I'm doing it. ;) ~ karen
Feral Turtle
I can't keep polish on my nails even for 24 hours. My niece bought the light kit and I had two nails chipping within two hours of the application. I am just resigned to unpainted nails but at least we have a "rockin rocket stove pizza oven"!
Diane S
I was just asking about that yesterday in the drug store. They had run out of top coat and it is a good thing for me I guess. Had they had it in stock I would have shelled out the $$$! I have had so much more success with the gel using the light at home. You can pick up a light on Amazon for cheap. I have used the more expensive brands and the Sally Hansen light activated gel. Of course the CDI lasts longer and is thicker, but he SH is fine as well. I don't like chipped polish and find myself wanting to have a manicure last longer than 3 days. But working in the garden, even with gloves on, wrecks the mani! My pedi's last longer so I guess I need to wear shoes on my hands too! Thanks for the review since it will save me money. I would rather buy a light and do at home gels to save money.
judy
I can not for the life of me understand why anyone would want their nails to be BLACK! This is an indication that you are dead...........as in a corpse! or in an advanced stage of becoming a Zombie! And for strong nails try Kirkland/Costco Glucosamine1500 mg Chondroitin 1200 mg. It has given me long strong nails where I used to have only splits and broken into the quick-ouch! Also it has helped with knee pain. Hope this info helps somebody and give it some time to get into your system.
Jan
SNS at my salon is THE best stuff ever created. The tech paints on a clear layer, then dips the fingernail in a colored (or clear) powder. Two layers of that, two more coats of another clear substance, a bit of polishing with the little machine thingy, and it wears like concrete! They can "fill" the new growth or put on a different color every 3 weeks or so, as long as it's a little bit darker, without redoing the entire nail each time. The product won't peel or lift up, and it doesn't smell when applying. Been doing this for about 2 years and wouldn't go back to gel nails ever!
Sboo
What about nail wraps? Are those a thing in Canada? A couple of my girlfriends here sell Jamberry, but I'm sure there are other brands too. They're essentially vinyl sheets that adhere to your nails using heat – and also claim to last for two weeks. My nail polish always chips immediately, so I've been curious as to whether these types of wraps actually work.
Regena Fickes
i am right in there with everyone who had been thinking of getting this. THANK YOU SO MUCH!
Melissa in North Carolina
Thanks for the product test! I hope you take this stuff back to get your money back.
Tell us more about your cat, I didn't know you have one.
Jean
People can be cruel. I'd have given you cardboard
Karen
Oh I know. People are assheads. Someone did offer me a clean hypodermic needle though. So all hope in humanity isn't lost. ~ karen
Maryanne
Thanks for the review! It's always a great day when I save money - and you just saved me $25 (or so) :)
BTW, the legend on the picture needs to have "reg. polish w/ reg. top coat" put on. Right now there are two sections that have "reg. polish w/ gel top coat".
Karen
Yup, it's been corrected Maryanne. Thanks! ~ karen
Debbie W.
I bought the Sensationail kit from Shoppers Drug Mart, with the led light - it was pricey at around $70 or $80. I searched for product reviews and it looked like most were happy with the it, so decided to go whole hog, and not mess around with a less expensive kit. What I love about the kit is that 1) your nails stay super shiney (I tested mine at our cottage, digging up rocks and cleaning up fallen branches/sticks) 2) after you do the last step, which is wipe the nails down with some sort of solution, your nails are DRY! no waiting - that is where I run into issues with regular nail polish, cause I will get the bright idea to maybe paint my nails right before bed, or 10 minutes before I am to head out the door 3) the led light thing-ma-jig, is big enough that I can fit 4 fingers or 5 toes (I have small feet) - so I get super shiney toes too! 4) my nails lasted almost the full 2 weeks, I tend to pick at my nails, so by my own fault I had picked where the gel had started to lift. and 5) to do a full manicure, it took me about 1/2 hour. the only thing I'm not a huge fan of is soaking the nails in some kind of chemical crap to remove them. But overall, compared to the salon, my nails looked just as nice, and lasted just as long! Thanks for sharing your thoughts on the Sally Hansen stuff! I really love reading your reviews on products you try!!
LazySusan
I've never been able to tolerate nail polish. The minute I put it on, I want to take it off, so I just gave it up decades ago. I will put a clear coat on sometimes, if my nails seem a little soft, for protection, and I'll up the amount of Jello I'm eating to get them stronger. As others have pointed out, the chipping issue could be minimized with a color that doesn't draw stark attention to it. And I've heard good things about nail wraps and longevity regardless of gardening and woodworking, so you might add those to the list of things you try. I don't know what brands are best, but I'll bet someone else will come along with brand names eventually.
Anna Starner
So glad you did this experiment. I was wondering if it would hold up significantly, I guess not. Thanks for saving me time and money.
Danica
I tried this stuff as well and was really pissed when it didn't last. I'm glad you wrote such an honest review.
Mary Werner
For all my life my nails peeled in layers like a banana. My cuticles were begging daily to be bitten and I had tiny slivers of nails from biting all the rough edges. If I filed them, I didn't bite but why bother when they peeled off? THEN, I tried cuticle oil. Every 3 or 4 nights, I rubbed some in to the cuticles and all my nail troubles went away. I now file them every 10 days or so, where no polish but when I do, I ALWAYS buff them first so the polish lasts longer. I don't have any cuticle problems - they don't seem to grow much now that I keep oil on them. The oil also strengthened my nails I guess and I couldn't be happier with them. Cuticle Oil is the miracle product! I use it once a week and angels sing in the background.
Nancy
Dear Mary,
Do you realize there are 192 cuticle oils. I have the crummiest nails in the universe. Please be specific about the cuticle oil NAME! Thanks.
Nancy
Mary Werner
The name on the little bottle says "Cuticle Oil" Avocado "E" for Nails and Skin. When I looked on the back in small letters it gave No Lift Nails, Inc and noliftnails.com. The ingredients are Avocado Oil, Almond Oil, Vitamin E so there is nothing but oil in it. I got it at a franchise chain called Sally's but don't think it is same Sally as the nail polish but it could be. They had tons of different brands and sold beauty products for nails. I would think any cuticle oil would work the same. Hop your results are similar to mine - it seems a miracle after all these years to have nice nails with little work. Good Luck.
Susanne Cruey
I use this cuticle oil from Sally's as well. It's a great product. A tiny bottle lasts me a year and I use it several times a day. You should massage it into the cuticles and the surrounding skin and add a heavy hand cream to seal it. My nails peel and split. I found a product that is a miracle according to myself as well as many nail bloggers. It's called Derma Nail, nail conditioner. You have to use it twice a day and it takes about four months to see the results. It will harden your nails and is not damaging like other nail hardeners that contain formaldehyde.
Pam
So disappointing... A nice manicure is such an easy way to help me to feel put together.
When my nails are nice, I feel like everything is good.
I had the same results with the Loreal Gel polish set.
At first I added it to my polish colour chart but it's been moved to the "bad" polish list.
Karen
You have a polish colour chart???? ~ karen
Pam
Yes of course. White paper with a swip of each colour polish and the brand and colour written beside it. Then my favorite colours have an * beside them and they are in a separate compartment in the wicker nail polish box. Don't ask how many are in there, too many would describe it!
Rondina
You have nice nails. Why on earth are you hiding them under black polish?
Stephanie
I had a manicure this summer with my mom and sister and got the gel polish - I was more resistant to chipping but barely lasted two weeks before it was starting to peel off at the edges (I may have *cough* helped it a little). The thing about gel nail polish that is cured with UV light is that it needs pure acetone to remove it (very expensive unless you work in a lab like I do), plus a scraper thing... Manicures are too expensive and the home kits are way too time consuming for my taste. Back to regular polish for me on the rare occasion I use any (the whole working in a lab thing)!