The Blizzard of ’11. Meh.

SNOWMAGEDDON!

THE BLIZZARD OF ’11!

Meh.  Wasn’t such a big deal.  And it’s kind of upsetting. I was looking forward to experiencing the storm that all my virtual friends in Chicago were experiencing.  I followed their Tweets and tracked their Facebook pages keeping myself updated on what looked like a storm that was actually going to be as big as everyone was predicting.  It was exciting!  A storm of epic proportions!  Meh.

Now, with each post I write here on The Art of Doing Stuff I try to impart a bit of wisdom.  A tip or trick or tutorial.   Today, I have a little information some, but not all of you may know about.

It is the Skittle Scale.

Most non-catastrophic storms can be measured by the Skittle Scale. The junk food scale.  The size of the storm is directly proportionate to the amount of junk food it makes you crave and therefore eat. For me it’s the Potato Chip scale, others refer to it as the M&M scale, further south it’s referred to as the S’more scale, the Moon Pie Scale and so on.

People want to hunker down with bags and bags of junk when a storm is on its way. The bigger the storm, the bigger the cravings. It’s all scientific an’ shit. I think David Suzuki did a study on it, but I’m not 100% positive about this fact.

I’m sure it was the same for the pioneers.   QUICK!  MABLE!  STORM’S A COMIN’!  LOOKS LIKE WE’RE GONNA BE SUCKIN’ ON SUGAR CUBES TONIGHT!  AND WHERE’D YA HIDE THAT SALTED PIG’S EAR?!

I didn’t even get through an entire bag of Ruffles.  It was a 1/4 bag of chips storm at best in Southwestern Ontario.

Alas … it wasn’t the storm of the century but there was a lot of wind and a bit of snow.

Midnight

12:35

First glance in the morning

Morning Trek

Morning Trek for 4 legged creature

Looking back, it was an O.K. snowstorm. I probably could have scarfed down another 1/4 of a bag of chips.  Salty, crispy potato chips.  It’s kind of heartbreaking to think of them sitting in the cupboard all lonely and dejected.  And salty and crispy.

Could you just excuse me for a second? I have something I need to do. Thanks.

Have a great weekend!

ANY CHARA CTER HERE

Post amendment.
I wrote this post prior to actually shovelling the snow.  Turns out we got 11″.  The storm has been reassessed at a full bag of Ruffles storm. Which were promptly consumed after shovelling and snowploughing.

37 Comments

  1. Evalyn says:

    When it storms, I crave soup. How sick is that? Soup and cornbread.

    • Karen says:

      Evalyn! Nope. That makes perfect sense to me! Soups are hearty and if you’re like me you top them with croutons. Unless of course .. you have cornbread! MMmmm. Now I’m craving cornbread. And a storm. ~ karen

  2. Ran says:

    Living in the desert we don’t exactly get a lot of snow (unless you’re in the high desert, which means you deserve snow because it’s cooler there in the summer) but we had the backwash of the rest of the states. There’s something terrible about 15-20mph winds that make 20F feel like -6 while the sun is shining and there’s no humidity. It’s probably like being flash frozen, which is why I rated it on the donut scale. 1 dozen, is you’re curious.

    • Karen says:

      Ran – Krispy Kreme? I love a good Krispy Kreme. Hard to get ’em in Canada though. Where in the desert are you? I’m always fascinated by where everyone who reads this blog lives! ~ karen

      • Ran says:

        Karen, we used to have Krispy Kreme until the owner (who was a scoundrel) did some underhanded things and all the poor employees showed up one day to find the locks changed. Very sad, sadder that we can’t get them warm and fresh anymore. Now I patronize a nice little place called Wheel Donuts, and they are delicious. White cake with maple and chocolate frosting, truly a treat!

        I am in Tucson, Arizona which is smack dab in the middle of the Sonoran desert and right next to the Saguaro National Forest. I guess we count cacti as trees?

  3. Jessica says:

    My husband and I finally finished our digging out this evening when we tackled our garage and the alley! So we rewarded ourselves with pizza (delivered, of course) and wine. Lots of wine. I measure the impact of a storm in wine…

    I’m sure you’ve seen dozens of pic of the awesomeness of Chicago’s storm, but here are a few more for your viewing pleasure:
    http://maliaraephoto.com/blog/?p=818

    Love Jessica.
    In Chicago.

  4. Traci says:

    your writing is hilarious- love it

  5. Anemone says:

    I was disappointed as well. O well…Uni got closed for a day…
    It was a storm but we were outside enjoying it…
    I didn’t get potato chips…boo hoo… parents insisted on buying milk instead…(can’t be out of milk during a storm) omg…

  6. Christina says:

    When I first start reading a blog I typically read the most recent 2 or 3 posts to get a grasp of what I’m getting myself into. I just read your 10 most recent posts and I’m fairly confident I could keep going. You have just earned a devoted reader! Please tell me how you manage to be so damned funny and interesting every day of your life.

    I wanted to mention in response to your post from a couple days ago about Happy Today gifts that I am, like many others, completely enamored with this concept. My boyfriend is an identical twin and he often buys his brother things he calls Brother Gifts for absolutely no reason. I’ve always found this adorable but simultaneously wondered where the hell my Girlfriend Gift is at.

    • Karen says:

      Christina – Thanks so much for the compliments! I’m gonna have to go back and read my 10 latest posts to see if they were actually any good. For your information, I am only funny and interesting in my blog posts. In real life I’m very sullen and angry. ~ karen

  7. Heather says:

    I have never eaten a “1/4 bag of potato chips”. If I start a bag of chips, I finish that bag of chips, and I don’t need a natural disaster to justify this. I greatly admire any person who can stop at a 1/4 bag.

  8. Joni N. says:

    I’m pretty sure I ate my weight in peanut butter M&M’s whilst waiting for the blizzard to hit Chi-Town. Oh, and I also ate a load of tortilla chips and guac.

    • Karen says:

      Joni – Good for you! By the sounds of it, that storm must have been between 12″ and 15″ of snow. According to the Skittle Scale that is. ~ karen

  9. Betsy says:

    It has been really mild in Portland OR this winter, except too much rain, but I was so stressed about ya’lls storm I ate a 1 pound bag of M&M’s over the past two days.

  10. Lisa says:

    I had a bag of salt & vinegar chips, ritz crackers and a wedge of double cream brie and three bottles of wine. Half was consumed during the storm, the rest after 8 hours of shovelling and plowing. I am still sore!

    Lisa, in Chicago.

  11. Betty says:

    We had several inches of ice. Couldn’t eat any snacks, got to get into the bathing suit on Spring Break in 2 months. Can’t eat anything!!! And the kids have been out of school for 4 days so far.

  12. Jeff says:

    I had been snacking on homemade Chex mix during the various snowfalls the Midwest has received so far. Witht he Snowpocalypse heading my way, I found myself unable to make a new batch of Chex mix so I bought the pre-made stuff at the store. What a dissappointment!! I had to go back out before it got really bad and get Cheetos and a Payday candy bar. Now we are talking! Karen, I am glad the remaining chips were able to fulfill their purpose in life. Happy snacking!

  13. Patricia says:

    Arrrrgh! I live in Virginia – supposedly the SOUTH, but noooo. We got a heavy and wet snow last week and I sat in traffic for 8 hours, (longer that I sit at my desk) and then I had to fight for the last hotel room in Leesburg. Meanwhile my husband and kids are eating SMORES (Oh, dear God did I miss the mother-load) before a roaring fire, watching the Three Stooges. Pity me. :)

  14. Stefanie says:

    This is why I live in Florida! It was 75 degrees and sunny yesterday and the same is predicted for today.

  15. mimi says:

    Lol re your Ruffles scale!
    I was looking at the snow pics and thinking “she calls that a bit of snow”??! Just as well you updated! have a lovely weekend, I envy you the snow, we’ve only got wind here!

  16. Emma Proulx says:

    Karen,

    I just discovered your blog via Design*Sponge and am thoroughly impressed and inspired. your writing makes me laugh big, and your crafty ways make me wanna craft big. in short : AWESOME. and, for the record, here in NY I have had one large bag of salt and vinegar chips snowstorm, and one small box of oreos snowstorm. I like to call moments like those “snackcidents”

  17. We got diddly SQUAT up in the Pacific NW. I was all prepped with my junk food but nooooooo snow!

  18. Alexandra Dare says:

    Karen – Potato chips. I eat potato chips. Just like you. And they are delicious. ~Alex

  19. Sue says:

    Well, here east of toronto, I was pretty disappointed, so looked forward to being snowed in. Stocked up on Mars bars, chips, dips (chains, whips – remember Weird Science, ha, I digress) and most importantly a box of Chardonnay. And it was just another winter day. Oh well, I need another excuse to indulge. Happy Thursday! *hic*

  20. Alexandra Dare says:

    SNOWPOCALYPSE!

    Man, our power went out and everything.

    I also slipped on ice and nearly died. Not really. But it could totally have happened.

    Also, I think I broke my toe. But I guess that is unrelated to the Snowpocalypse because I stubbed it on luggage.

    I did discover that I’ve already surrendered to the “Apocalypse.” Once all the electricity goes out in the world, I give up. My survival skills are lacking and I cannot live without hot showers.

  21. Kana says:

    Snowfall in Boston this winter has reached over 70 inches so far.. Does that mean I deserve 7 bags of Ruffles?

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