There I was. Wandering the aisles of Dollarama like I do most weeks when a grin as wide as a photoshopped thigh gap spread across my face.
I had gone for a spray bottle, but left with 3 bags of artificial grass. I'm sure you've seen them there before. They're just squares of fake grass or moss. They're pretty ugly really and I'd always wondered who would buy them and WHY. Turns out the answer to that question is me and because it was exactly what I needed.
I had been looking for something for a specific area in my backyard for weeks and nothing was right.
This. Would. Be. Right. Yup. Ugly is apparently what I was looking for. Who knew.
I danced my way up to the cash thinking this day couldn't get any better. Then, while checking out with my favourite Dollarama cashier, she grabbed some clothing from under the counter and handed it to the manager saying she'd found it in the craft aisle. Someone took their clothes off in the craft aisle?, I asked. Oh yes, she said. And this wasn't the first time. People do it all the time. She then went on to tell me all the stories about the Dollarama customers who disrobed and the one woman who left her coat and car keys in the store never to return for them. To this day, no one knows how Chilly got home that night.
So clearly, the day got even better. Plus I bought chips and was better dressed than everyone else in the store because I had my good pajamas on. So ...
For the rest of this week I'm going to show you the 3 projects I accomplished with my 3 bags of fake grass squares.
In fact the one was so good that Canadian Living was going to feature it in their May issue next year. But then they ran out of time while they were shooting here. (Canadian Living was here shooting my kitchen for the October issue of the magazine) At least they said they ran out of time.
The first project I'm going to show you is the one that I KNEW I was going to use the squares for.
My Ikea patio table outside is great. I love it with all of my heart. It's big and comfortable and feels more like a dining room table than a patio table. But it was looking a little blank.
I tried a bunch of different things on it and it just wasn't looking good. Ferns were too high, the neighbour's tricycle just looked stupid and leaving it bare made the table look oh so lonely. Like it was never going to have someone sit and eat at it ever.
Dressing it up like a real indoor table wasn't working because well ... this table was outside. There had to be some sort of compromise or combination of inside meets outside.
And there was.
A grass table runner.
I could have made a real grass table runner with a length of sod and it would have looked GREAT for a picture, but it would have looked like crap in about 3 days. BUT if you're having a party and you have a long table like this a roll or two of sod down the middle would be FANTASTIC.
The dollar store fake grass squares come with little nubs on the edges so you can actually attach them together so you don't have to worry about them shifting or pulling apart.
The squares were $2 each which made this table runner $24 to make. It works especially well in my contemporary backyard, especially because the other side of the yard has a large artificial turf rug.
Dollarama you've done it again.
Now where did my shorts get to? I'm almost sure I was wearing some when I left the store.
Sandy
Dollarama is my go-to for doggie poop bags. Maybe I should buy some fake grass and see if she'll go on that . . . I wonder???
Sally
I love reading your blog. The best.
Kari
I wish we had dollarama in the US. So jealous!
Dagmar
I betcha any money some loon comes to the dollar store and changes into some new clothes they like better there, and hence-forth leaves their old clothes behind. That way, they think they can get away without paying $5 for new clothes. But really, does that make any fashion sense to anyone? I can't imagine buying clothes at a dollar store. Maybe my dad was right, I'm a fashion snob. Oh well, I could be called worse things, I suppose.
P.S. love the table runner. Although the second I saw it my first thought was you having a nice get-together, with candles and lots of people chatting, enjoying your awesome backyard oasis, and them *swoosh* the table runner goes up in flames. I hope that never happens.
Karen
Hi Dagmar - Well, they're fake candles and I'm pretty sure the funner would just melt like the Wicked Witch of the West anyway. :) ~ karen!
jainegayer
Yay!!!! A Dollarama post!!!!
Su
:) fake grass table runner... how chic!
jane
Karen, you remind me of my Grandmother. No! Wait! Hear me out!
World traveler, amazing adventures: things happened to her. Her house looked like it fell out of a magazine. Things had a story, and she was a suburb story-teller, so people would ask. Oh that?
That knick-knack was given to me as a hostess gift by the King of So-and-So when we had tea last month: belonged to his great grandfather. That one? That was on sale at K-mart.
I have both knick-knacks on my bookshelf now: reminder to me that I can choose carefully, but it needn't be expensive to be perfect for the space.
Karen
LOL. I like that story for a variety of reasons. ~ karen!
Suanne
I saw the heading of your post, and I must admit....my pulse quickened a bit. AT LAST!!!!! A Dollarama post!! I love all your quirky and helpful ideas, but the Dollarama ones are absolutely, without a doubt, my favorites. Thanks for a good start to my day. Can't wait to see the other two projects. Wish ther was a whole week....or two. :)
Tigersmom
" a photoshopped thigh gap" Can I get that at Dollarama? Our dollar stores here in the US suck.
Chilly
That's where I left my keys! Thanks!
Tigersmom
HAHAHAHAHAHA! Good one, Chilly!
Karen
Hah!!! Oh Chilly, it's so good to see you're O.K. ~ karen
mimiindublin
Epic post!
and the comments are almost as entertaining as the post itself.
This is something I would never do, cos I love pristine, but sooo enjoyed reading it. Your backyard looks superb Karen!
Friends of ours covered their entire backyard in fake grass, and made a putting green. I though it a mad idea, but, as Penley says, after a bad winter.....
Penley
Oh I am just so glad you've bought back the Dollarama posts. Probably my favourite, because it doesn't matter how much money I'll ever have in my life, I'll always be a cheapskate at heart who loves a bargain. And I love hanging out in the pound stores (or here in Oz, 'Chicken Feed' and 'Ship Loads') and I love finding treasures where others only see junk. So it's YAYs all around!
Friends of ours put fake grass in their whole backyard in London, with the reasoning that it wouldn't get torn up by their kids playing soccer there in the winter. I thought it was the height of hideousness, but I did have to admit after one particularly long and grim (and the English really do long and grim) winter their lawn was almost neon in its relentless green. Not like their neighbours'. Plus their kids get amazing gravel rash from it, and they're the sort that probably deserve it :)
Cynthia Jones
Love the grass runner. Also love the fir tree? in the background. Are we allowed to post links to other sources for things like fake moss, for you?
I'll bet you vacuum the fake grass. I only say this because I think you are as bat-shit eccentric as I am, and I vacuum my concrete outside. (with my head down so the neighbours can't see me).
You could find a little toy lawn mower and use some clippers to make some a track in the fake grass. Put the mower at the end of the track, glue a pile of leaves on and stick a pair of doll's legs hanging out of the pile of leaves. Just for fun.
On Halloween you could make a special effects slaughtered Barbie doll to place strategically and at Christmas you could spray the whole thing brown with some globs of dry ice sitting on top to represent snow.
Aren't you glad your readers share their great ideas with you?
PS You opened my eyes to the delights of the cloche. I spent $25 on real live moss at the flower shop and added
some dodda vine, some grandfather's beard, a real piece of funghi on a bit of bark and a fake stalky mushroom, along with a piece of pretend gold nugget and some real raw amethyst stones, a little hollow log with a gold coin in it. This was a DIY Assembly Happy Birthday present for my friend across the other side of Australia.
Sprinkle with water once a week.
I loove cloches. Thank you for the introduction to another source of joy.
PPS I got two 8 ounce bottles from the Dollar Shop. One to take my supplyof one glass of my favourite wine out with me and one for my shampoo. The one earmarked to carry the wine has a vintage style label which reads.
Ayer's Sarsparilla Purifies the blood. Quickens the Appetite. Makes the weak Strong. Cures others, will cure You. Sounds good enough for me.
Stephanie Hobson
I love that the comments on Karen's site are as entertaining as her posts. "Bat-shit eccentric" ftw.
Karen
LOL. THat's quite a claim. And yes, you can include a link in your comments but only up to 2. Any more than that and my spam blocker thinks you're spam and doesn't allow the comment. So link away! ~ karen!
Kim from 3 peanuts
Oh good cause I want to see that cloche she made!!!!
Nancy Blue Moon
Oh dear Cynthia..please don't give her any gruesome icky ideas for Halloween..she is quite scary on her own..If you don't believe me check out past Halloween posts..The doll baby still gives me nightmares..
Liesl Joubert
I dare you to throw some feed on the runner and let the chicks loose. Think how cute the photos will be!
Stephanie
Love the fake grass outdoor-table runner soooooo much! Fabulous idea.
Robin C.
Love the table runner - it is perfect! And thanks for the laugh - it was much needed!
Robin
deirdre
Love the grass. Really love the wall planters!
Edith
Looks great! Very clever!
Deb
We bought that exact table from Ikea - love it - it is truly gorgeous and huge! we never did manage to get the black stain for it - every time we went back they only had the white...
I am sure in a few years it will need refinishing but it is a gorgeous table.
LOVE the grass runner idea - I think I might have a trip to Dollarama in my future (smile)
caryl hodgdon
Oh yes, you do make my day' Thanks for always allowing me the privilege of knowing a little insane is a good and wonderful thing. I'm so happy to live somewhat vicariously through your humor and creativity.xoxo