You Guys Can Suck It
And I Mean that in the Most Respectful Way

I regret to inform you that there will be no formal post today.  Why?  Why no post you ask?

Because I’m busy.

I’m busy playing.

I’m busy playing with this!



I swear to you.  That’s why there’s no post today.  I was busy working on a post when the fella came home  and said … and I quote “Do you have a minute?  I bought you a present today because I love you and I appreciate all the hard work you do for me all the time.  Plus I’m sortta hoping for sex“.

Then he pulled it out of his pants.  The iPhone that is.  The fella’s the one who bought me my first iPhone when it first came out years ago.  I never asked for one, never wanted one, never cared about one.  Until I got one.

So for the next few hours, while I should be diligently writing a post for you fine folks … I will be screwing.  Around with my iPhone.

Have a great weekend … I’ll report back next week.  About the iPhone.


  1. Karen says:

    Laughing so hard right now….and not offended one bit. Just the other day my fella was helping fix something in the bathroom shortly after he had showered. His robe opened up and all I could do was say “for gods sake Harold (not his real name) just close your damn robe!” I am sure many couples have conversations like this-you are just bold enough to post them. Do you need to fix the chandelier now?

  2. Lori F says:

    Ask Siri to write a post!

  3. Amanda says:

    I got my first iPhone 8 days ago. And I love it. Just make sure you get a case for the 4S and NOT the 4. The volume keys on the side are a millimeter further down on the 4S (so silicon cases won’t fit) and the speakers are in different spots.

  4. Kim says:

    I had a phone just like that until it fell out of my pocket while getting in my car at the grocery store…of course no one turned it in. I loved that phone! If I get another one I’m going to wear it around my neck! Love, love, love your blog!

  5. karenagain says:

    Lucky! I am going to get this very soon too.

  6. carole says:

    Jealous on all counts!
    BTW I don’t mind if you talk dirty, some of us have to live vicariously you know!

    • Karen says:

      Carole – I’m sorry … I couldn’t quite read your comment properly, what with me hanging upside down from a chandelier right now. :) ~ karen

  7. kelliblue says:

    oooooohhhhhhh mama… (orgasmic noises in a somewhat jealous tone) Awesome. A new iPhone, a hot fella AND sex? Dayum. Ride ’em cowboy…er, cowgirl. ;-)

  8. From your Motorolla Flip Phone, can’t bear to part with her $10 a month plan, reader… enjoy. I say that with a healthy dose of envy. ;)

    • Karen says:

      Rosa – I absolutely LOVE the Motorola Flip phone. I used to have one. Great, great phone. I still think about it sometimes. ~ karen

  9. Renee says:

    Hey y’all..I have the first generation, cracks mended with tape, the whole nine yards..people ask what the hell is that?? I don’t care, it still works, well, kinda. You’ll be pleased to hear that my sister is gifting me her 3G this weekend..! I feel pretty cool..and didn’t have to suck anything!!
    so there! Loveyoumeanit!

  10. Renee says:

    It goes like this,” Is that a present in your pocket or are you glad to see me!! You absolutely make my day!! Your writing and artistry is refreshing!! Rock on Sista…enjoy the ride, wink wink!

  11. Design Love says:

    It amuses me that he thinks, or knows that this kind of gift may make you want to shag!!!! lol….Enjoy Karen & Fella


  12. Andrea Clem says:

    LMFAO, ain’t that like a man to expect sex in return for gifts. Too freakin’ funny, you go on with your bad self. We’ll wait =)

  13. Lynn says:

    We got the new 4S this week after fighting with the old 3G forever. The new phone is amazing!

  14. Barbara says:

    I’m just a wee bit jealous….my fella never pulls anything like this out of his pants :o/

  15. Britt says:

    I don’t have the S… just the 4… I guess I’m not cool anymore!

    Have a great weekend Karen ;)

  16. Nancy says:

    I always read what other people post before I comment..I laughed when I read what Jenn wrote because from reading her comments before..I knew she was just kidding…you have fun this weekend..with the phone and the fella!!!

    • Karen says:

      Deb J. – Holy crap. HOLYCRAPHOLYCRAPHOLYCRAP. I … I … I need to have this thing. Like a kid with a new toy, I’ll probably only play with it a few times but it’ll be worth every dollar. Holy Crap. ~ karen

  17. taria says:

    well, hopefully the fella will get more than we did.
    Have fun. Not offended here. Just smiling and wishing you fun with whatever this weekedn. : )

  18. Lianne says:

    I’m so offended that I laughed out loud! Love it! So jealous and yeah, definitely one of your tamer posts!

  19. Babs says:

    I agree with Jenn. Poor choice of words……I enjoy your blog a lot…..but this post…well…was in poor taste and I’m not a prude! Just sayin’!

    • Karen says:

      Babs – Jenn is a longtime reader of this website and I’m fairly certain she was kidding about being offended. In fact, I know she was. If this particular post offended you, I’m terribly sorry. But at the same time, if this particular post offended you, this might not be the best blog for you. ‘Cause trust me, things can get a lot worse than this post on this blog. ~ karen

  20. Brigid says:

    oooooooooooooh. jealous!
    you two have fun together while the fella watches.

  21. roxana says:

    Completely off topic – wasn’t October the month when you’re supposed to plant the garlic?

  22. Sarah says:

    Enjoy your new phone. I have a Droid and am thinking I want to make the change. Looking forward to hearing all about it. Have a great weekend!

  23. Tamra says:

    Cool! you have to check out this site… – HYSTERICAL. So jealous. I have my white iPhone 4 because I washed my other one in the washing machine. No siri for me, I wish I would have waited another month for my old phone to take its ride. So I will live vicariously thru this site and others with the 4S for now. Have fun!

  24. Exactly how I felt when I got my iPhone – didn’t want one, didn’t care about one. Now? If you tried to take it away? I would do you serious harm. Serious harm.

    Have fun!

  25. Alicia says:

    I have that same exact one, white too! :) Well I guess it’s not the same exact, rather the duplicate.. In any case, it’s my first iphone and a huge learning curve upgrading from the Blackberry Bold.

  26. Nicole says:

    I wish I had a hubby. Like that. Mine never brings me gifts, he’s too busy playing with his blackberry.

  27. susan Preston says:

    Oh we can screw around together! I got mine today too .. by Fedex.. I had to buy my own! But we can send pictures back and forth … of chickens and call each other and …and everything. Well when we’re not too busy playing with all the games and … great info apps and telling it to call somebody! Yahoo! Gotta go. I gotta call somebody. Love Suexo P.S. Enjoy!

  28. I’m obsessed too. Mainly because with WordPress I can blog from it! Don’t go there. It’s a slippery slope.

  29. Jamieson says:

    Mine finally arrived yesterday too. So smoooooth

  30. Pam says:

    Next week? So soon?

  31. Jerrica says:

    My hubby bought me the first iPhone too! It was the first gift he ever gave me. This new 4s is badass! Enjoy! Let us know how you like Siri ;)

  32. Carrie says:

    You are fantastic. And I am jealous. …Of the I phone of course. (Okay and maybe the screwing too.) Cheers!

  33. Gigi says:

    He may regret the gift, as you will most likely fall in love with Siri. And he will then need to compete for your affections. Although when you tell Siri that you love her, she gets a bit wigged out. She just isn’t sure how to respond. She may even ask you exactly what you are looking for, because you have confused her. At least that is how she responded to me.

  34. Antonia says:

    Great post! Enjoy your new phone!!!

  35. Jenn says:

    You’re a dirty, dirty little monkey, telling me to “suck it” then talking all about something that was in yer fella’s pants. Shame. :P

  36. Marti says:

    I think the appropriate phrase here is “Put it back in your pants, Karen.” ;)

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