This week was the kind where I played delicately with my delicate poodle in the house and smashed some antique china, and also harvested an 8 poundcabbage. Which I feel like is the full human experience.
Let’s begin.
Table of Contents
Maureen Died
Maureen, my Venus Flytrap, died this week.
She'd lived longer than most flytraps, had a good run, and ate more than her fair share of unsuspecting ants. She was moody, complicated, and liked her drinks distilled.
She is very much dead.
I’d say she died doing what she loved, but really she just slowly gave up over the course of a few weeks until one morning I walked outside and she was a tumbleweed. First she complained because she was too wet, then up and died from being dry.
RIP Maureen. You were carnivorous, temperamental, and impossible. May you rest in my compost pile.
Shattered: One Flow Blue Gravy Boat
Philip and I were playing a very reserved game of chase inside, as one does when it’s August and you’ve hit your outdoor heat limit for the day.
He made a sharp turn. I made a sharper one. The flow blue gravy boat did not survive.
It was a really beautiful one too.
On the plus side, the wheat sheaf table it flew off of is still fine, along with a couple of candlesticks I'm quite fond of. Not as fond of as the gravy boat but that's the price I pay for inexplicably having a gravy boat in my living room.
Not so inexplicable actually - it's where I held my peanut butter cups. All wrapped in gold foil no less. I'm very fancy when I'm not hand squishing bugs.
The Garlic Barter Economy Is Thriving
My neighbour came to pick up a piece of misdelivered mail. I left 6 heads of garlic on the porch for them to take too. I didn’t say anything—just quietly placed the garlic there like it was part of some underground vegetable exchange program.
The next day, a jar of sauce appeared on my porch. Then a text. It was a jar of garlic gratitude.
I added ground beef, boiled pasta shells, tore up some basil, and called it dinner.
Would you like to save this stuff?
We'll email you this post, so you can refer to it later.
Right. And cheese. I added a lot of cheese. I ate it four nights in a row, which is exactly the right number of nights for something that starts with “free sauce from a neighbour.”
🥬 Harvesting, Bit by Bit
The garden harvests are picking up. I've been forced to weed even more so I can actually see if there's watermelon in my watermelon patch.
There are. Three of them. They aren't ready yet.
This week:
- 8 lbs of potatoes
- One 8 lb cabbage (it's a flathead known as Gunma)
- Zucchini that look like they were drawn from memory by someone who’s never seen one (They're growing all weird looking because the soil at my community garden is SO dry. Watering every other day no matter how deeply just isn't enough. The soil needs organic matter badly so it can hold more moisture. Sorry, I'll stop with the random gardening tips now.)
- A few paste tomatoes that looked like they might be normal, but weren't (I'll reserve my tomato tips for this blossom end rot for another post)
I couldn't wait. I have to tell you a little bit now. I want you to know if that your tomatoes look like this, flat and black on the ends, you have blossom end rot. JUST CUT IT OFF. The rest of the tomato is perfectly fine to eat, don't think of them as a wasted tomato. They're only half of a wasted tomato.
Part of the cabbage is going into winter cabbage soup this weekend, the rest into coleslaw. After that I’ll be left with just enough cabbage leaves to fashion a bikini for sun protection or slaw on the go. I haven’t decided yet.
Flowers & the First Dahlias
The zinnias and dahlias are blooming.
Miss Tegan, one of my semi-cactus dahlias, is just starting to fluff up. I paired her with some Floret zinnias for a small arrangement and stuck it in a dinosaur vase, because I’m an adult and I can.
There’s a lot of flower arranging happening in my kitchen right now. There’s also an absence of available counter space and matching socks.
🦟 Bug Bites and Bad Ideas
I scratched my leg so hard this week it bruised.
I think it was a chigger bite from the garden, but could’ve also been a mosquito with ADD. Either way, I’ve now reached the stage of summer where I consider keeping oven mitts on my hands just to get through the itching.
Anyway—everything’s fine, and I’ve learned literally nothing from the experience.
That’s it for this week. Next week I’ll try not to break any heirlooms or scratch myself into a new skin tone. I promised the sprinkler fix post this week but you didn't get that. I'm sorry. It will be ready soon.
If you’re looking for me, I’ll be outside. Wearing cabbage. Making soup.
Becky Bosque
As the owner of my grandmother's flow blue china I know how disappointing a break is. Since you have soooo much spare time (ha!) why don't you try to kintsugi that bad boy back together? It'll be fun! I look forward to your post on that. On another note, the fly trap that I got for my grandson got "fried" in the TX sun. Oh well...
Kat - the other 1
One of two bug bite remedies I'm trying this year, with some good results.
Apple cider vinegar
Witch hazel
Optional: essential oils, like, tea tree, menthol, peppermint.
Optional but recommended, very finely crushed aspirin.
If you add the aspirin you can also use this on acne, a 2 for 1.
Still working out exact ratios for the vinegar and witch hazel, frankly I'm not sure exactness is even necessary.
So feel free to pick a well sealing bottle to use and leave some headspace, ( I used a 3oz travel bottle for mixing then put in a 10 ml roller ball tube, not crazy about the tube, maybe a bigger one...) Mix either equal portions of the liquids or slightly more vinegar than witch hazel is fine, or the other way around. It's fine. Using straight up vinegar burns / stings like heck so you just need to dilute it, and witch hazel also helps with both things, acne and bug bites, but they work better together.
Add a few to several drops of desired essential oils if using, and for a 3oz bottle I estimate 2-4 FINELY crushed aspirin if using. The aspirin does not dissolve, or at least it never has for me, so crush as finely as absolutely possible. Shake the bottle well, after closing. Fill your desired dispenser, shake before every use.
If desired after mixing add a small Comfrey leaf to the mix for 3 days, then remove and decant. Not sure if this helps but it hasn't hurt. It also seems some bug bites just don't respond to some bug bite remedies, so this works for some and you may have to reapply, but for the ones it works for it really helps. Plus it usually helps zits / spots too so. The other remedy I'm trying this year is a cream of herbs from the garden, mostly Comfrey (it's new this year), but I didn't have any beeswax so it's kinda a mess and I have to keep it in the freezer or fridge lol, but that is helping with some of the bites. Ps that plantain you wanted to kill in your yard, it's supposed to be really good for rubbing on bug bites. I don't have any yet to try so that's just from reading.
Anyway, hope we all have fewer itches!
Oy that sounds kinda wrong. 🤔😆
Robin
But were the peanut butter cups okay??
(priorities)
Kat - the other 1
True. 😂
Need to know!
Pamela Roberts
Have you seen how some Chinese people use lotus leaves for sun protection? Quite hysterical and perhaps to consider for your cabbage leaves. https://www.instagram.com/reel/DLC6ZcdxdmT/?hl=en
Ann
Chiggers LOVE me. I get at least a couple of new bites most days of the summer.
Buy a product called ChiggerEx, sold in the US at Walmart. Cheap stuff but it has a numbing agent in it that really does work. The moment you feel you have a bit, rub it on. Within 10 minutes or so it will stop itching. Reapply if it itches again later. Never, ever scratch and each individual bite is usually gone in less than 36 hrs. I rarely have to put the ChiggerEx on more than twice, often only once. BUT, if I ever scratch, say accidentally in the middle of the night, it will itch for days, and often go completely nuclear...
Kat
Was always told too to cover them with clear nail polish. Supposed to suffocate them or something?
Numbing would be nice.
Caroline
Garden produce looks great. Best thing for bites and stings, bug or plant caused, is lavender essential oil. Just put it on neat, BEFORE you scratch, if possible, and it will totally disappear. Oh yeah, works for burns, too.
Kay
Except for when this is how you find out you're allergic to lavender. Poor mum. That was awful.
CrazyHair
Love, love, L O V E the Dino vase full of flowers. What an appropriate tribute for Maureen, may she rest in peace. I hope she enjoys the flowers❣️
tuffy
Awesome predatory Dino vase!! So great w your big flowers in it! It’s like Trex has become an iguana flower girl instead!😅
Also, bummer on Maureen. Maybe another try - I’m sure if anyone can figure those plants out, you can.
I’ve never have been successful..
I’m a bite itcher like you- but worse. The 2 things that work for me are baking soda rubbed into it (yeah some sting) and Benadryl *cream*.
Nina
Sorry about Maureen and the gravy boat: things bite the dust in this world. As for that nasty bite, every time I get a bite in the garden, I rub an ice cube over it whenever it starts itching. Instant relief.
Have a better week!
Terry Rutherford
What a beautiful cabbage! Mine are lacified (not sure it’s a word but it’s descriptive) but there are heads. Unfortunately I’m hiding from the heat and making 7-day pickles. RIP Maureen and the gravy boat. Will you glue it as an ornament?
Bad air tomorrow. Stay safe.
Kat - the other 1
Interesting, make Christmas tree ornaments from the broken pieces!
You can do it Karen, we believe in you! 😁😂
Randy P
Always a fun read - R.I.P. Maureen and one nice gravy boat. Hey,
stuff happens. Whutcha gonna do?