My whole life I haven’t known my blood type and I’ve always kind of wondered about it. Was I a glamorous and rare AB-? A diverse and valuable O- ? Or just some common type that probably ate plain toast for breakfast every day and had a favourite “I ❤️ cats tee shirt?”
The reason I don’t know my blood type is because in high school when we were all testing our blood in Science class, my friend fainted, and I took her to the bathroom to recuperate. By the time we got back to class, the testing was done and I never learned if I was A, B, AB or O. I did however learn that when you faint it’s possible you’ll pee a little in your pants and your contact lenses might pop right out of your head and land in a puddle of fainting urine on the floor.
When this spring a friend suggested he thought I was an O blood type based on my love of back breaking manual labour I started to become curious about both my blood type and his willingness to label me a type O based on how much I like to dig dirt.
It turns out there may (or may not of course) be a correlation between your general health, the foods you eat and your blood type.
Eat Right For Your Type is a diet book that was published 21 years ago. When I say diet, I mean making the proper food choices to be the healthiest you can be, not necessarily to lose weight, although that is a possibility. And the food choices you make should be based on your blood type. The book goes into great detail and examples about how your blood type dictates what foods you should eat and how often to keep you at your healthiest. It claims that your blood “reflects your internal chemistry … and actually determines the way you absorb nutrients”.*
Apparently, according the book, people who have type O blood are workhorses. They love manual labour and their bodies thrive on it. Blood type A on the other hand are a bit more delicate. They’re the loungers and relaxers of the world because they’re easily agitated by stress. And that’s how their body performs the best. Their body actually thrives on their laziness, anything too physical or stressful is too much for their delicate little constitutions. So you blood Type As aren’t just lazy, you’re scientifically lazy, which lends a certain authority to your binge watching of Netflix shows.
Was my insatiable desire to constantly be doing stuff bred into me by my blood?? I needed to read this book.
But before I could get the book and determine whether I thought it was right or wrong I needed to find out my blood type.
My first plan was to give blood because they must have to determine your blood type if you do that. I mean that’d be the professional thing to do, right? Well they do, but it turned out there wasn’t a blood clinic happening near my house for another couple of months.
Plan 2. Go to the doctor and have her schedule an appointment to have my blood tested at a clinic. This seemed like a pain. It involved making an actual phone call like some sort of person from the 1980’s and taking up her time on something that probably wasn’t life threatening. At least at this point I didn’t think continuing to eat wrong for my blood type was life threatening.
I ended up going with Plan 3.
It turns out there are kits you can buy online for testing your blood type at home. The kit includes everything you need like teeny tiny little sticks, an eyedropper, a finger poker, and the most important thing, the Eldoncard.
An Eldoncard is a piece of paper that has been manufactured to react in certain ways to your blood. You just drip your blood on it, swirl it around and voila. You know your blood type. Kind of.
However, I actually found a package where you got the book Eat Right For Your Type and an Eldoncard on Amazon.ca which was just $20 for both the card and the book. It makes no sense, but the Internet rarely does.
So you want to test your blood type at home because you’re curious and a DIYer and you love poking yourself with a sharp things. Perfect. You’ve come to the right post.
HOW TO TEST YOUR BLOOD TYPE AT HOME
- Lay out all the components of the kit in front of you.
- Add a drop of water to each circle on the Eldoncard.
- Sterilize your finger with the alcohol wipe and then prick your finger with the lancet.
- Squeeze the tip of your finger to get a big drop of blood. Using one of the plastic tools included in the kit, transfer a drop of blood to one of the card circles.
- Do this for each circle.
- Swirl the blood and water droplet together in each circle using the same plastic stick you used for gathering the blood.
- Tilt the card in each direction for 10 seconds.
- Now compare your circles of blood to determine which blood type you have.
A note about the lancet. It doesn’t hurt at all so don’t sit there for 10 minutes putting it to your finger then taking it away, then putting it to your finger then taking it away. Then getting a drink of water. Then coming back and putting it to your finger then taking it away.
Don’t worry. It hurts so little you might not even be sure if it worked.
Keep your hand down if you can. This helps the blood rush to your fingertip if you have trouble massaging enough blood out.
Anyone pass out yet? Are your contact lenses still in?
Remember to lay your plastic sticks with the same circle you used so you don’t cross contaminate once you have to swirl the blood and water together.
If I’m being perfectly honest with you, which I try to at least appear to be at most times, I screwed up my first kit. I didn’t swirl the mixture around enough and I didn’t use enough blood. Not to be beaten by a stupid paper card with circles on it, I ordered another kit and did it again with much better results.
Here’s a handy video of me making myself bleed so you can get a better idea of how to do this.
The only trouble is, after doing this test … twice … I still wasn’t really sure about what my blood type was. I thought it looked like a B-. Or it could be O. But probably a B-. Certain people have weak antigens or pathogens or anglicans or something, which would make my “Anti-B” circle hard to read. Actually I think the word is Agglutinate.
This is the card they give you for reading your results.
It kind of helped, and I was pretty sure I was a B- but I wasn’t positive. So I ended up booking an appointment at the next blood donor clinic to confirm that I was a B-. More on that shitshow experience in a week.
And in Friday’s post you’ll learn why it is I can’t eat a good turtle burger this weekend. So there’s that.
Wanna learn your blood type?
Click here if you’re in America.
Click here if you’re in Canada.
*from Eat Right for Your Type, published 1996.