My mother doesn't swear. She'll tell you that if you ask her. Ask my nephew and he'll give you a different answer. When he was 6 years old he declared that "My gramma, smokes, drinks and swears a lot" to his Kindergarten teacher.
In his defence, the teacher did ask what his grandmother was like. The photo above is my mother's "I'm in public so I can't swear face." Notice the pinched smile and hands gripping her knees.
Of course my mother was mortified when she heard about what my nephew said to his teacher. He hadn't even mentioned her sassy fashion sense.
So I get my love of clothing, my migraines and my colourful language from my mother.
Unless you ask her. In which case she'll say she doesn't know what the hell I'm talking about.
Of my two sisters, one swears and one does not. As in, I have never heard her swear a word in my entire life. Ever. Not once. Not even in secret I bet. She also doesn't drink, smoke or lie and has natural blindingly blonde hair. She's no fun at all.
My OTHER sister? She's lots of fun.
I first published this post asking if you swear, TEN years ago and haven't looked at it since. I cannot wait to start scrolling through the comments. I have noticed in that time I've adopted a very weird habit.
Instead of swearing, sometimes out of the blue I say "Darn it all to heck". Mainly in place of one of the lower grade swear words like shit. For instance if my toast burns it might get a Darn it all to heck, whereas a few years ago it definitely would have elicited a SHIT.
I maybe just don't care as much about toast as I used to.
So tell me my little assheads. Do you swear? And before you answer no, think of the second thing that would pop out of your mouth if you were to smash your shin on a glass table. (I'm assuming the first thing would some sort of grunt or cry)
I'll go first. Yes. I swear. And it isn't because I have a poverty of vocabulary. I'm simply a fan.
Suzanne
Hell yes I swear! I am a descendant of Irish seafaring captains (Burke) who settled on Fogo Island in Newfoundland. I would be letting my side down if I didn’t swear like an Irish sailor.🤪 I am proud to use colourful language, in all the right places, at the correct times, for the perfect reasons! Love you Karen!
Susan
Well Rat Farts! You damn well better believe it.
Jan in Waterdown
You bet yer sweet a$$ I do! I grew up in a family where “jeez” was a bad word. Then I got a customer service job at Ma Bell and everything went to hell in a hand basket. I’m retired now but my mouth isn’t.
Lauren
Of course I swear..... but I also have a filter. I find the current acceptance of vulgar language in any setting discouraging.
vicki
My husband is a premier swearer. Professional class. I have learned much over the past 30 years. ##$$!!@@
Gale A Gors
Like a sailor. Thank you very much.
Kippy
I don’t. Had a job interview for office work at an industrial company once. The boss seemed a bit short tempered and swore frequently during the interview. I called later and said I didn’t think I was a good fit for the job. Supervisor agreed.Maybe it was because I flinched every time the boss swore.
Brenna
Like a goddamn trucker. And I say that with authority. My dad worked graveyard at a packing house and to save money on babysitting I got to tag along on Saturday nights. After a truckload load of pigs was unloaded, stamped, cleaned, and fed, we’d go to the local greasy spoon called The Rooster Tail and have breakfast with the trucker. Some might consider this questionable parenting, I thought it was awesome!
Meg
oooh I wish there were a way to search older comments without loading all of them up first... (Did I reply the first time to this?! I bet I did, if I saw the OG post. I love swearing.) (Also not because I lack the vocabulary either!)
Anyway. I swear. However, I'm distinctly not "most people." So we can't reliably gauge anything about those folks, from me. Most of my "normal" friends rarely say "shit," even the ones who frequently say "shit" don't drop F-bombs very often. I, however, have a vast history of swearing even while at work. No, -especially- while at work.
I am a VFX artist and have worked on 2 coasts of the US and with folks in a dozen countries. I have never met a VFX artist who did not swear. (See, I lie too; I just remembered there was one mormon fella who did not. He was a sweetie. And somehow did not swear, despite being surrounded by the rest of us.)
The issue is that VFX software is incredibly complex, very crashy (try losing 8 hours of work, when your deadline is 12 hours away) and takes a long time to process your work. So a mistake last night could cost you this morning's work. A bad mistake could mean the entire studio was unable to get work done because of your mistake. The stakes are always high. The cascade of casually catastrophic problems that happen constantly in VFX work lead to serious burnout. But before the burnout: spewing spentences that would make most dockhands blush.
The people in the commercial side of VFX generally swore more. There are tighter deadlines and far worse clients. The folks in the feature department swore a little less, with the exception of the FX guys (the computer generated explosions, crumbling, breaking, destruction, clouds of smoke, etc) because they typically had harder tasks and the least ability to complete them. As deadlines loom and folks start coping with huge stress, the language always gets more colorful.
So yeah. I swear a LOT but I've tried to get a little better lately, simply because the East coast people don't swear as casually as the West coast of the US. Plus really most people do NOT pepper swears into everything as liberally as I do.... so yeah I'm trying.
Karin
I am a better than average educated woman with a better than average vocabulary and yep, I swear. There are times that just call for an f-bomb. I do try to watch what I say in front of my grandchildren. Not that they'd be offended, but because they would more than likely go to school one day and let out one of Meme's favorite words.
Evil Andie
Yes! Every day, all day long like a trucker.
Kate
Situational trucker mouth, here.(no offence intended to truckers.) Shit being my everyday expletive to F**K for really serious shin, toe smashing.
Pattie Meyers
Probably couldn’t speak without swearing (except around grandkids). Don’t want to. 72. Loads of women friends who also swear like sailors. Listen to Julia Louis-Dreyfus podcast. That’s how it’s done. Thank you for asking.
Megan
I used to, in my late teens and early 20s. By my mid to late 20s I was phasing it out. I have substitute words (frick, dang, etc.) but don’t swear for real anymore.
Anne Hogan
Yes.. I do swear but my favourite is from my best friend ... "Bugger, Hell and Damn!" We even said it in chorus at her funeral.
liz
You betcha! When my daughter was 3 in christian pre-K her teacher called me in to report that Sarah was looking at a book about insects and exclaimed "what the hell is that?" I pretended to be appropriately appalled. Of course, she got that expression, along with her dazzling green eyes, from me. Guilty, of that and much worse!
Missy
yes, I swear----a well used "fuck" is sometimes the most effective!!
Cheryl
Well, yes, I used to, till I had grandkids, gave it up for a long time and still try to do better, but the political corruption going on in this world has me back swearing worse than a sailor!!!!
LeeAnne Bloye
Why yes Karen, I do swear and it isn't occasionally. I will probably get a ticket while gardening if a cop drives by when the hose, waste bag cause grief or when any random object is just out of reach.
My dad's expletive was "snapping blue arse holes" - not an easy phrase to adopt but probably don't even count as swear words these days. My husband's favorite over-heard swear was "Christ on a Cracker".
Marilyn Meagher
Well , I guess I’m not the norm, I don’t swear much. The odd time. I use shit but I avoid the f word . Not because I’m holier than thou but because it’s vulgar and overused. My Mom and Dad didn’t swear and my husband while around the house isn’t much of a swearer. I have sworn when the occasion merited it and certainly an f bomb used properly can be very effective but it isn’t my preferred manner of speech. There’s nothing worse than being out with people who swear like troopers and you are in a beautiful setting with people all around and they are cursing. Sorry to those that like swearing but to me it makes you look small and uneducated, and lazy. Find some other words. There are so many beautiful ones.