My mother doesn't swear. She'll tell you that if you ask her. Ask my nephew and he'll give you a different answer. When he was 6 years old he declared that "My gramma, smokes, drinks and swears a lot" to his Kindergarten teacher.
In his defence, the teacher did ask what his grandmother was like. The photo above is my mother's "I'm in public so I can't swear face." Notice the pinched smile and hands gripping her knees.
Of course my mother was mortified when she heard about what my nephew said to his teacher. He hadn't even mentioned her sassy fashion sense.
So I get my love of clothing, my migraines and my colourful language from my mother.
Unless you ask her. In which case she'll say she doesn't know what the hell I'm talking about.
Of my two sisters, one swears and one does not. As in, I have never heard her swear a word in my entire life. Ever. Not once. Not even in secret I bet. She also doesn't drink, smoke or lie and has natural blindingly blonde hair. She's no fun at all.
My OTHER sister? She's lots of fun.
I first published this post asking if you swear, TEN years ago and haven't looked at it since. I cannot wait to start scrolling through the comments. I have noticed in that time I've adopted a very weird habit.
Instead of swearing, sometimes out of the blue I say "Darn it all to heck". Mainly in place of one of the lower grade swear words like shit. For instance if my toast burns it might get a Darn it all to heck, whereas a few years ago it definitely would have elicited a SHIT.
I maybe just don't care as much about toast as I used to.
So tell me my little assheads. Do you swear? And before you answer no, think of the second thing that would pop out of your mouth if you were to smash your shin on a glass table. (I'm assuming the first thing would some sort of grunt or cry)
I'll go first. Yes. I swear. And it isn't because I have a poverty of vocabulary. I'm simply a fan.
Stacey
Fuckin’ A!! Why would I let other people decide what I can and can’t say? I use cuss words mindfully, for effect. I try not to be offensive, but colorful language, used in moderation can be very powerful. What I don’t like is when people drop the same cuss word in every other sentence out of habit.
Sonja
I'm the exception...as well as my husband. Never have. Never will. Probably how we both were raised.
Susan
Depends who’s around. Sometimes I use Eugene Levy’s advice and add ‘crying out loud’ right after the f bomb. It works a treat!
Donna
Yes, but I am getting better. Just this week, my husband who does not swear, maybe 5 times in over 40 years bust out the f bombs because there was oil on the table that got his phone oily. What did I reply: “A B C D E F G”. To let you know how far I’ve come I’ll let you know about my 1st born. He was about 1 and had mastered mama and dada to Dammit after he knocked his cereal to the floor. Wonder where he got that from
Margaret
So funny my 8 year old grandson asks if he can swear when he hurts himself. I believe it helps so he gets the green light
Trish
27 years in the Navy - I am a fan and swear like a sailor! That being said, my mother doesn't swear and I'm sure she thinks I don't either....she is pretty much completely deaf and refuses to wear a hearing aid because we are all too noisy. Phew. :)
Ellen
You're SO wrong! VERY FIRST THING when I stub my toe is an f-bomb that can be heard IN SPACE. I keep thinking that a woman of my advancing years should be more refined. And then I just laugh and say "no fussing way"!
Linda in Illinois
Swear !! Oh hell no. Lol. Love you Karen.
Pam
Fucking hell yeah! (but only at appropriate times 😉)
Stacey
I say “rats” around my students, but swear quite a lot otherwise. I got it from my mother. My Dad only swore twice that I can remember (both times directed at me).
Missy
Why yes, yes I do! Like I was the offspring of Samuel L Jackson.
My sons best friend once made the comment "your mom is the f bomb kinda mom!" LOL
Not proud, but i own it, cause its the f*@kin' truth. xoxo
Jane C
A former neighbour used to say I had trucker mouth, but I kept the filter on around his kids. Never dropped an f-bomb until something traumatic and demoralizing happened where I worked and now, despite some effort, I cannot remove it from my vocabulary. One day I said "Christonafuckingcrutch!" and a friend thought it was hysterically funny.
Theresa Clarkson-Farrell
OH BOY! Yes I do and I have a few go-to phrases-- that said I also teach ( middle school and High school) so I also have substitute phrases or noises (lol) one for shit is Shubbubba - this I got from fellow teacher and sister - When I use this the class generally bursts into laughter. Presently outside of work, I find "F**k you and the horse you rode in on" is quite the show stopper. There's a time and place for all language. When I'm teaching Theater Arts there's always someone who wants to use a Mamet monologue ( the KING of vulgar language) or a student who writes something - "realistic" - In this situation, I walk a fine line in terms of censorship - Therefore we have the Five F**K rule - you can not say F**k more than 5 times AND you have to be able to support/defend the usage.
The origin of some of the curse words is interesting as the "foul or unacceptable" word generally comes from the language of the conquered - the language of the dominated group. This is also seen in terms of class structures -- "cursing like a sailor" goes to -- at least partly -- that sailors were not considered high up on the social ladder. Therefore their language was not socially acceptable. So I curse in solidarity, I curse democratically when it's appropriate -lol
Grammy
My mother had the dirtiest mouth you ever heard. Of her six kids, four of them didn't/don't swear, but my oldest sister and I made up for the others. That sister died less than two years ago and I miss her immeasurably, but only just a teeny bit because of our colorful phone conversations.
I always told my own kids you have to know when not to use that language and you'll be fine. I also have an extensive vocabulary and only use cursing for emphasis (good or bad), but never around people who I knew not to swear. I worked for the government for 35 years and never, ever uttered a swear word at work because I figured the taxpayers deserved that I didn't.
When my grandson was 3 and kept pushing the limits by continuing to do something I'd told him not to, I looked at him, lowered my voice, and said, "Don't fuck with me." I don't know if he'd ever heard that word, but my tone of voice let him know things were getting serious and he changed his behavior. Fast forward to a couple of weeks ago when I said to him (he's now 14) about somebody who was doing wrong, "He's going to fuck around and find out," and he knew I was serious. All the routine cussing he's heard growing up hasn't made him into a foul-mouthed fool, but he does know how and when to use all the words available when he sees fit.
Judy
https://www.facebook.com/reel/6093959767398727?fs=e&s=TIeQ9V&mibextid=0NULKw
Cathy
God bless America and all the ships at sea! I have grandkids.
Tine
Career in the Navy while we raised our daughter. I was careful not to swear at home and we were so pleased her favorite and only"swear phase was My Word.
Then she came home after one semester in college using profanity that would make a sailor blush.
Julie
F yah I do!!! Lol
Peggy
I didn’t really swear until I retired. I was a teacher and did not want to swear in front of my students. So I just made it a point not to swear. Still don’t use the f-word but other swear words do come out of my mouth sometimes.
Susan
I have a t-shirt that says
I'm a lady with the vocabulary of a well educated sailor" that about sums it up. Lol