I was up Googling how to get rid of heartburn in the middle of the night a few years ago and came across this. If you find yourself in the exact same position this is the instant cure I found that works.
If there's anything I've learned about being a grown up it's that there's a lot of weird shit that goes on inside your body as you age. Holes get bigger, muscles get smaller and plantar warts appear even though you aren't a teenage boy on a swim team.
Add random heartburn to that list. I used to think I had some type of rare and special disease but as it turns out .............. I have gas. Gas in itself isn't all that bad. Especially if you make your living by belching the alphabet (which I do not).
It's when you can't get the hell rid of the gas that it's a problem. When it just builds up and builds up inside your tiny little locked down stomach.
There's no movement going on in my gut or intestines. You know how your stomach gurgles throughout the day? I have no gurgling. There are no gurgles. I'm gurgleless. I bend, I stretch, I move around. I even hop on the spot in an attempt to burp myself (which actually works). I do Yoga poses entitled "Wind Releaser" and twist back and forth trying to force some kind of movement out of my stomach and convince it that everything's O.K. No one is attacking it.
I have no stress, I'm not bothered. Unless you count how stressed and bothered I am by the excruciating pain in my methane filled gut.
And then I burp (or otherwise) and everything is fine with the world.
The other thing I get the odd time, which is equally excruciating, is heartburn. I have a very important sounding condition called, gastroesophageal reflux disease or GERD for short. Basically it means angry acid makes its way out of my stomach and up towards oesophagus.
Table of Contents
What's GERD?
Gerd's a condition that allows acid from your stomach to travel up your esophagus causing heartburn. The muscle that separates your stomach from your esophagus relaxes at the wrong time which allows acid to escape and make its way up your throat. The Mayo Clinic knows all about GERD - read about it here if you weirdly want more information on it.
To help stop the symptoms of GERD I take a medication. Because of that medication I don't get heartburn symptoms from GERD a lot, maybe 2 or 3 times a year but it's always when I'm sleeping (that just makes it more noticeable because the acids can make their way up) and it always wakes me up wondering what the hell is going on, and did why did I eat a pot of blazing fire in the middle of my sleep?
How to Get Rid of Heartburn?
There is one thing you probably have at home right now that will help to instantly get rid of heartburn: mustard. A teaspoon of regular, squeeze bottle, mustard can instantly take the pain of heartburn away.
You can also:
- Stand up.
- Chew gum to dilute the acid and help wash it away. There's also bicarbonate gum that will neutralize the acid!
- Drink a spoon of apple cider vinegar.
- Chew Gaviscon tablets.
- Eat a piece of candied ginger. (this works great if you're nauseated as well)
Why Does Mustard Work?
Mustard acting as a remedy for heartburn isn't just woo-hoo hooey, there's a scientific reason behind why it will stop your pain immediately. Mustard is the perfect natural cure for heartburn because it's alkaline. Therefore, it will neutralize the acid in your stomach.
Yes. A teaspoon of mustard. Regular old, Heinz or French's mustard. Eat it. If it bothers you imagine there's an Ikea hotdog underneath it. The first time I did this I remember almost gagging. The hotdog thing helped me out a lot. Now I kindda enjoy my teaspoon of mustard.
Heartburn at Night
If you get heartburn when you're sleeping, run to the kitchen and take a teaspoon of mustard. Before you get back into bed plump up your pillows and lay down with your head and chest as elevated as possible. You don't have to be sitting straight up but the higher your head is the harder it is for acid to travel up your throat.
I've heard of and tried all of the other tricks. Salty water, soda water, cider vinegar, Gaviscon, Tums .... all of it. And the only thing that has ever, actually, truly worked instantly ... is mustard.
Discovering mustard works as a home remedy was almost as shocking as when I discovered my frozen yogourt tampon cure for yeast infections.
It does NOT work 100% of the time, but it works most of the time. So if you're up in the middle of the night right now, stop reading already and go and eat a teaspoon of mustard to see if it helps.
I've had gut issues for as long as I can remember. I don't think I stress about stuff or get tense, but my stomach thinks otherwise. My stomach thinks I stress out A LOT and it, being the extremely thoughtful organ that it is, gets angry for me. Angry like a nest of wasps made out of acid. So my stomach takes care of all the stress and anxiety I feel, without having to bother my pretty little head about it.
I'll believe in my mind that I'm moving along fine in life not being bothered by a thing when my stomach will start to tighten up. Then I'll feel a bit bloaty maybe. Then I'll notice my stomach is tightening, hard as a rock and ballooning to approximately the same size as a Water Buffalo. You know how when a country thinks conditions are unsafe and it's under attack, it'll go into lockdown? My gut goes into lockdown. Like North Korea.
I can't absolutely and completely guarantee that this is going to work for you but I can tell you it's worked for a lot of other people (you'll see proof in the comment section) and definitely works for me when Kim Jong-un rears his ugly head (and weird haircut) in my gut.
A spoon full of sugar may make the medicine go down, but a spoon full of mustard can destroy a dictator.
If you have another proven heartburn trick let us all know. Not something "you've heard works" or something you've read about please, only things that have actually, for real, worked for you. The Internet is a big fat liar so everything you read on it isn't always true. Except this mustard trick. It's true.
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Lupe
Next time I will definitely have to try that! I love mustard!!! This is my remedy but it's store bought I eat 2 Bonine (for motion sickness); they're chew-able and taste pretty good and like you said prop yourself up with pillows. Happy Valentine's Day!
Lynn
Hi Karen I never had a problem till I was 55 then I had appendix out 😕 then bang , it started with a vengeance. I have found Apple cider vinegar helps me , but I also like mustard on lots of things since appendicitis Of late an both combine to help me.
Shannon Kerley
Now, this may not work for everyone; but everyone I know that has tried it, swears by it... Pickle juice. Not pickles, just the pickle juice. Drink it straight from the jar if you have to, but take a swig when you feel that little burn start, and it'll take away that feeling pretty quick! Trying to rally any and all Total Wine or BevMo stores to carry bottles of straight pickle juice! Why not, Brooklyn Bookers have come into vogue again at the bars!! Google it, kids!
Anyway, give it a shot and see if it works for you. Might be a bit easier to come down that a spoonful of mustard!
Shannon Kerley
Brooklyn hookers, not bookers!
Audrey A. Ogilvie
Karen, I remember when you recommended this some time ago. It works like an absolute charm. Like you, it only happens to me occasionally. Last night was one of the few times. Had been to a lunch party with fabulous rich and sugary food. Woke up in the night with a blazing camp fire in my throat and headed downstairs to the fridge. I have recommended this cure to others, saving them from calling the paramedics. Your sound advice is always welcome.
Audrey D.
Karen, I love your blog. Just want to give a heads-up - if you take meds for stomach acid, be sure to check if you are on Proton Pump Inhibitors or H2 Blockers. May make a BIG difference for your bones.
Years ago I was treated with meds and they greatly reduced the chronic cough caused by all the acid, but I got osteporosis after being on them several years. I cannot prove causality, but make sure you read the fine print where it says if you use them too long you "are at risk for fractures". I went off the PPIs, got two shots of Prolia and got my bone density back.
A few years later my doctor put me back on a different drug and I forgot to check if it was a PPI. Bone density went down again. My Bone doctor convinced my Ear, Nose & Throat doctor to change me from Proton Pump Inhibitors to H2 blockers. I have also reduced my portion sizes considerably to try to reduce the acid reflux naturally. Have to wait till August for my next bone scan but meanwhile I will certainly try the mustard route.
beth pulsipher
Papaya enzyme! Comes in chewable tablet form from just about any pharmacy. I get mine from Walmart, chew 4 or 5 small sweet tablets, and pain disappears. I carry bottles at home and in my travel luggage, and it works every time.
Eileen
I had terrible gas in my 30s and 40s. And stopped eating anything with sugar in it. Gas Stopped completely. Like a miracle. If I eat junk, like corn candy, once a year, here it comes, gas and a headache. Sugar really messes me up.
I’ll keep the mustard in mind. I don’t drink soda either. All chemicals.
whitequeen96
I actually bought a box of mustard packets from Amazon. I gave some to several friends to keep in bedside tables and coat pockets. My Mom has Alzheimer's, so she's always horrified when I recommend it, and always amazed when it works in less than 5 minutes. It IS counter-intuitive, but it's extremely effective.
Gayle m
I have GERD and my only symptom is a cough--from stomach juices reaching my larynx. Was prexcribed Prilosec 24. So I elevated the head of my bed 6 inches and added 2 pillows. Helped. Then I started having more stomach issues. Lots of dicomfort. So they upped the Prilosec. Twice. Nothing was helping and I was so uncomfortable when I ate. So i dropped the meds, and all symptoms disappeared. The meds were the problem. So...10lbs later...lol.
Susan Mouser
On the other hand - a spoonful of sugar will almost always stop the hiccups. My daughter was born with almost constant hiccups and her foster mother taught me that. For infants, baby spoon of sugar with drops of water to liquify. For grownups, granulated dry and toss it back fast. Worst that can happen, you ate a spoonful of sugar! No one ever believes me until they try it!
Leslie Russell
It's past midnight. I've been on my phone all day, mostly looking up answers to random weird shit like how to fix my phone charger and the perfect technique for applying gel polish to keep it off your cuticles. I've said "OH! I wanted to find out how to..." and been gone all day. Then tv...I actually started watching a documentary about cats taking over the internet. I don't have cats or like them very much. GO TO BED!! Ok, so I'll just mix up my baking soda in water to put on my nightstand...maybe a peek at my email...
MUSTARD???? See? There's a reason I'm awake!
Thank you, Karen.
Letty Regan
Heartburn... great movie with Meryl Streep and Jack Nicholson. Definitely appropriate for Valentine's Day.
AronM
Wow, mustard! It never occurred to me. I don't think a lot of people know about this either. Wow, thanks so much for this tip. I might try this but yes, I think I might gag as well as I've never eaten a spoonful of mustard before. I've been experiencing heartburn these past couples of months and I've read a lot of tips about heartburn relief (check it out here if any of you are interested: https://westwoodwellness.com/heartburn-relief/). I've tried them and some have been pretty effective but wow, mustard? This is new. Very interesting. I'm trying this for sure.
Safetydog
My husband has had major gas and heartburn issues for years. He tried your mustard tip several times and ... it worked! He was surprised! He's used over the counter products and prescription. The mustard proved reliable and cheap.
Karen
Weird, eh?? It doesn't work for me 100% of the time but when it does it's instant relief! ~ karen
Old Man
Whenever I think I'm having a heart attack, I drink a half teaspoon of baking soda (tastes like old refrigerator)in half a glass of water.
If I instantly burp & feel better, I know it's not my heart.
Sabrina
Omg! This mustard thing worked for my heartburn quicker than any remedy I've tried. Thanks so much. I was at work suffering with horrible heartburn and constant spitting,it worked for the heartburn but not the annoying spitting.
cris
i’ve been suffering from the same exact issues especially the spitting, let me know if you have anything that can help
Bethany
Hi Karen!
I just wanted to thank you. You blew my mind! I read this post and tried it out when I got home from work. You see I'm 7 months pregnant and along with being pregnant comes heartburn. Your mustard trick is a life saver. I have posted about it on a bunch of mommy boards and to all my Facebooks friends. I also now carry mustard packet in my purse. Yes I steal them from various places but it's for a good cause! Thank you so much for sharing this tip!
P.S. Love the new site!
Joy
I'm a little late to this conversation, but wanted to add my two cents. I've had serious intestinal/etc issues the past year and went to numerous traditional doctors before ending up with a chiropractor who also did "nutrition response testing" (I've actually never been to her for chiropractic care, only nutrition). It looks like voo-doo and works like magic. If you can find someone who does nutrition response testing, I'd highly recommend it. After a year of killing my thyroid, going through a miscarriage, mono, pneumonia, laryngitis, bronchitis, and the flu (twice), I've finally started to find health. I had my first 'normal' blood test results in over a year! I can sleep! I don't have heartburn anymore! :) I appreciate that this doctor doesn't just mask or attack symptoms (like heartburn 'remedies' that don't actually fix the core issue), she determines the core cause and treats that (and once that is fixed, the symptoms go away). It's a fantastic way of approaching medicine and, like I said, I've personally seen great results.
Aurora Clarke
Gas, Bloating, Heartburn, indigestion are all the result of food allergies or food intolerance. For me it was Wheat and Dairy! Blissful gut now for 3 years :-)
Do get tested Karen
Christina
Wow, I'll definitely try this next time...beer was the only thing that ever worked for me, but I can't have gluten anymore. :(
I had the exploding stomach DAILY for years, and then learned I was allergic to leafy (and other) greens. Stupid lettuce.
Christina
Oh, and I want that spoon you have!