Look how happy this lady is as she cleans her kitchen floor in her high heels! That’s because she’s clearly drunk. For the rest of us cleaning is a chore, but these cleaning tips will help make it less hateful.
Allow me to introduce myself. I’m Karen. And I want a sucky robot. Not a really bad robot, but rather one that crawls around on the floor sucking things up. A robot sucky thing. I don’t know the official name for it but I *do* know I’d call it Lipo because it would suck away all evidence of potato chips.
Roomba! That’s the name of the robot vacuum. I just remembered.
One of the first “handy” things I ever did in my house actually was to install a central vacuum. I still love it but … not as much as I’d love a cat hair eating robot on wheels. It just seems stupid to have access to super-advanced cleaning technology and not take advantage of it. I love all things “technology” that make life easier.
Had someone invented a Woomba I may have even given birth.
The magical Roomba aside, most house cleaning still has to be done by hand and no matter how special we think we are, deep down, we’re all the same. Common cleaning wenches.
But just because they have to be done by hand doesn’t mean you can’t at least be smart about your stupid, awful cleaning tasks.
6 of the Best Cleaning Tips & Products
These are 5 great cleaning tips and products that I use all the time.
1. DIY Chandelier Cleaner
Granted, not everyone has a crystal chandelier but if you DO you know what a huge pain they are to clean. You either have to stand there wiping, spraying and washing every single crystal as it hangs from the chandelier or you have to take them all off, wash them in the sink or dishwasher and then hope you can remember how to put them back on the chandelier.
I first tested this DIY mixture out last year with low expectations. But it worked GREAT. Just put a towel under your light, spray it on your chandelier and watch the grunge drip right off.
2. Magic Erasers
Seriously. As far as I’m concerned Magic Erasers are one of the best inventions in cleaning supplies history. You have to be a bit careful with them, they’ll scratch very delicate surfaces like lacquer, but for almost anything else they’re literally erase any stain.
A Magic Eraser will even erase sperm shaped Sharpie marks on walls. Yes it will, I proved it a few years ago in this video:
I’m not sure why it took me so long to figure out that buying black facecloths was the way to prevent staining all my white ones with mascara. I’m just glad I eventually figured it out.
When I first got my front load washer I kept looking for the spot to put bleach. There is no spot to put bleach. Which is probably good because over time bleach actually yellows whites. Oxiclean on the other hand doesn’t do that, is extremely gentle and WORKS. Read about the great pillow case experiment if you aren’t convinced.
5. Cat Urine Cleaner
Having a cat with renal disease means having a cat that pees a lot. How much? If I held my cat up and pointed her towards an apartment fire she could have it under control before the fire truck even made it out of the fire house.
Add in the possibilities of bladder infections and you’ve got a real problem. Plus of course some cats just pee outside of the box. It’s what they do.
After years of trying EVERYTHING to get rid of cat pee smell in my dining room I discovered this Internet recipe for cat pee. It’s a simple solution made with run of the mill household products and it actually works. it gets rid of the smell and some staining.
6. How to Clean Stainless Steel
Stainless steel looks great twice in its life. When it’s BRAND new and when it’s on the commercial stove of a restaurant cooking your dinner. Other than that, stainless is a pain. Or so I thought. The I discovered that the completely simple way to clean it wasn’t to buy those stupid oils and specialty cleaners for stainless (they can actually stain it or build up a hard to clean layer of cat hair attracting oil), but rather microfibre cloths.
If you can get past the creepy, catchy feeling that some microfibre cloths have they’ll be your best stainless cleaning friend. This post below shows the steps I use and the progression of cloths that’ll be the most effective way to clean stainless appliances.
None of these things are as fun as the roaming dirt sucker on wheels of course, but they’re not as expensive either. Mind you, I could make my money back on the thing in about a week if I opened up my home and held exercises classes where students had to avoid the path of the Roomba. I would call the class Roomba Zoomba.
Led by your instructor … Lipo.
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