67 Spring Cleaning Tips — But Just Pick 5 😆

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This 67-step checklist includes a pet section, optional cocktail protocol, and a lot of leniency. Get your house clean enough to impress - whoever is normally cleaner than you are.

Spring has a lot of swipe right qualities. Poppies for example. But then right there within the same bio facts as friend to worms and melter of snow, is spring cleaning. Barf.

Spring cleaning season is awful and I hate it, but let's get it underway with a fresh start & a stiff drink. I don't actually drink so I'll start things off with a flaming shot of CBD and a diet coke.

There are those of you that just stood up and CHEERED at the thought of a spring cleaning checklist - and then there's the rest of us. We're smart. We are not going to be fooled into cleaning by some snappy headline that makes it seem fun.

Cleaning is what people who don't like to get dirty do.

🍋 This is a spring cleaning checklist that will make you feel hopeful about your lemon scented future. 🍋

This list will make you 100% certain that YOU can do this.

Out of an abundance of caution, keep a stiff drink on ice in case things start to go south on you. That's what differentiate's my spring cleaning list from anyone else's.

Mine is catered to people who are potentially drunk.

As such, each task is safe & easily accomplished even while tipsy. Except maybe item #43 under the heading General Cleaning.

All links in the list lead to an instructional post on how to do that thing.

MY TIP

Let us be realistic.
Pick 5 things to do and then do them.
That's your baseline. In my opinion if you tick 5 things off the list you can pin a ribbon on yourself.

Table of Contents

Kitchen

Clear out your pantry and ditch expired or stale items.
Clean out and organize your fridge & freezer.
Scrub down the inside and outside of your appliances.
Wipe down cabinets and drawers inside and out.
Clean stove burners and oven grates.
Clean the oven and microwave. (extra points for cleaning in between the glass of your oven door)
Clean the sink and polish faucet fixtures.
Wipe down anything you've been avoiding.
Clean the outside of your dishwasher.
Sweep and mop the floors.

11. Butcher Block

12. Inside of Copper Pots

How to Clean Butcher Block Counters

How to clean the lining of copper pots.

Living Areas

Remove everything from shelves, tables, bookcases & cry. Then dust.
Wipe down mirrors and windows. I use this stupidly expensive squeegee which makes window cleaning just on the verge of fun.
Dust baseboards and door frames.
Vacuum upholstered pieces and clean leather furniture.
Wash or dry-clean curtains and blinds.
Dust and clean lamps, shades and bulbs.
Clean pillows and throws.
Clean area rugs.
Vacuum/wash underneath area rugs.
Dust and wipe down electronics like tv, stereo etc.

Would you like to save this stuff?

We'll email you this post, so you can refer to it later.

Bedrooms

Wash or dry-clean bedding.
Flip your mattress.
Vacuum or sweep under the bed. To my cat people, underneath the bed is prime barfing territory.
Declutter and organize your closet.
Dust and clean dressers and nightstands.
Wipe down mirrors and windows.
Dust baseboards and door frames.
Vacuum floors and carpets.
Clean any rugs.
Dust and wipe down electronics.

My Robot Vacuum Review

Bathrooms

Scrub the tub and shower.
Clean the toilet. With an actual cleaning product.
Clean the sink and polish faucet fixtures.
Wipe down cabinets and drawers inside and out.
Wipe down mirrors and windows.
Wash or dry-clean shower curtains and mats.
Sweep and mop floors.
Dust baseboards and door frames.
Organize your medicine cabinet.
Clean and organize under the sink.

Both of my sisters Pink Tool Belt and Fish Pedicure do all of those things on a daily basis so they're exempt.

How to Clean Your Headlights (Like a Pro)

General Cleaning

Clean ceiling fan blades.
Clean crystal chandeliers
Clean air vents and filters.
Clean and organize your entryway.
Wipe down doors and doorknobs.
Dust and clean picture frames and art.
Organize or tidy your home office.
Check/test fire extinguishers.
Declutter the basement - sell or donate stuff.
Change smoke alarm & carbon monoxide batteries.
Clean your car, inside and out.

Cats & Dogs

Clean and Organize Pet Toys: Ditch the damaged or dangerous ones. Wash rubber toys in the dishwasher and fabric ones in the washing machine.
Wash Dog Bed and/or Cat Litter Box

Groom your cat or dog. Bath, fluff and brush until they gleam.
Clean up the poops in the backyard. Wait for a dry day.
It's tick season. Do what you need to do.
Replace or refresh your cat's scratching post.
Wash leashes, collars, harnesses etc.
Inspect and fix any window screens that might be ripped from cat claws or pushed out from your cat sitting in the window.
Check your fence for areas the dog can get out.
Trim your cat's claws, trim your dog's claws.

Stuff You Wear

Clean and whiten your sneakers. I used my Oxiclean sheet method. DON'T put in the dryer. Let them air dry outside in the sun or near a heating register indoors.

Wash or have your winter coat cleaned.
Take the monkeyball of scarves and mittens out of the closet and fold everything neatly.
Double check that your summer clothes still fit.

I will admit that for someone who puts it off as long as possible, I have created a very good cleaning list. This is a list specific to spring cleaning but if you are feeling even more enthusiastic see how life changing editing my house was last January.

Happy cleaning!

Drink.